Wednesday, January 7, 2009

No Jacket Required. PENS WIN.


One win changes nothing. Two wins change(s) nothing.

Let's face it.
Winning this game is like beating Jim Abbott in rock-paper-scissors.

But it has lifted some spirits.
So plan the parade route.

A great blog that we've been checking out for a while.
No idea why we haven't linked to them before.
Maybe we did once.

eric p.




alex b.




There was nothing going on to start this game off.
But things were chippy from the outset.
Kovalchuk sends a message to Malkin.

Army, who all of a sudden decided to play his game against the Penguins, was a nuisance.
He jobs Tenko. Tenko and Army dance in a very short affair.

Tenk sends Army to the ice. Army's chin sends Fedotenko's hand to the dressing room.

After some quick crap, Crosby goes off for 4 minutes for hitting that dude he hit in the balls.
This time, he appeased the whiners around the league by hitting him as far away from his junk as possible.
The Pens kill off the 4-minute penalty.
That had a chance to be bad.

Armstrong was at it again after the PP when he takes a run at Bing.
They slap-fight for a while, and Army goes off.
The Pens get a power play. Yeah, right. One shot.

The Pens started generating some business for the remainder of the period.
Kennedy has an unreal chance, but he takes an hour to shoot.
Atlanta calmed the Pens attack down by putting them on the PP. Genius move.

Well, maybe not so genius. Hey, is that Sykora out there? Goal. 1-0.

And it is really sad that the Pens' first PP goal since Prohibition gets shown up by some dude in an unreal shirt making out with a carrot.

Upon further review, apparently the Pens have added a make-out section to the Mellon Arena.
Again -- what a shirt.

Kid top left = stunned

Face of the year.
Where did this girl think she was going tonight?

Late addition. Different "angle."
The guy in the white hat is the key. He is sitting next to them. Is it a three way dance?

Thanks to everyone that sent these in.
These pictures might need their own blog at one point.

We can't resist:
  • If you own a shirt like that, you don't read our blog. Period.
  • She is actually a different color. Unreal.
  • How long have they been dating? Smart money is on two weeks or maybe even a first date?
  • What section is this in?
  • How many times has she cheated on him?
  • EMPTY NETTERS ran a great piece on Jersey fouls a few weeks ago. Seth needs to make another set of fouls for goal celebration for fans. Making out with your partner is number one, no questions asked. You can't do this.
  • But the biggest question: What is the right thing to do? Do you give your girlfriend a high five? Do you hug your wife? What is the rule for going to a game and celebrating a goal with your partner?
A reader was there:

"I lost it when I saw your writing on this couple. I literally sat 4
people to their left. I am at the very right side of the east igloo. they
were right outside in the normal seats, making it section B6. The picture
really doesn't even do justice to how orange the girl's skin was... and
the guy looked liked he was selling crack."

Oh, there is a game.

Staal washing-machines a shot soon after, and Malkin gives Colby a DDT.
We forgot what a solid period looked like.



Early on in the second, Staal had a chance coming out of the corner. Yeah, right.

Atlanta keeps hanging around, but MAF is solid, and Atlanta blows.

We complain how bad the Pens have been, but we feel bad for Atlanta fans.
Not really.

Some meaningless faceoff in the second period when you coming back from taking a pee turns into cash money.
Malkin jokes some guy.

Where the hell would the Pens be without Sykora?

Almost midway through the period, some idiot takes a penalty.
Pens set things up.
Malkin tags Bing in. Deflectionblog for the MegaPowers.


Micheal Bolton gets some Free Candy before the intermission.
Can't wait for the pic of John Tavares and Ludacris next year down in the ATL.


Look, nothing really even happened in the third period, but if the Pens were playing a decent team, they could have lost.

About halfway through the period, the Pens get a 5-0n-3.
Now, this is what we are talking about:
During the 5-on-3, Petr Sykora gets no time with the first unit.

We don't know jack. But that is a mistake. Jordan Staal shouldn't even be on Wilkes Barre's powerplay right now. Make the game 4-0 and it's smooth sailing. But no, let the Thrashers off the hook, and Kovaljoke nails one home.

Right after that, Atlanta almost scores.
If they would have come back, at least seven people wouldn't have made it through the night.

The Thrashers do get a powerplay.
Head coach John Anderson calls a timeout to figure out who he looks like.

No dice.

The rest of the game was cake.

[Theresa V]

  • The game in Nashville is the biggest game of the season.
  • You can have Kovaljoke. Don't want him.
  • Atlanta's goalie is solid. How did they get so bad?
  • Andre Savard blinked. He is still alive.
  • wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo


Strange night in the NHL.

Ruutu bites Peters:


Blood in Chicago:


Go Pens.


eze3484 said...

Steiggy was puke inducing with his Thrashers are thrashing line

eileenover said...

I always look forward to the Asian kid after a win.

PittHockey said...

jobbing the guy kissing the carrot = best part of the recap

debrisslide said...


coffeytalk said...

this game isn't a big deal but i feel on top of the wolrd right now.

that may be the beer talkin but whatevs.

oh ruuuu, what happened to youu...

you used to be my weirdo love affair but for now cooke has stolen my heart...

go pens.

kirbee said...

i'm glad the Pens helped the fans put their suicide kits away for the time being. all hail sykora...the carrot jobbing made my entire night.

ps- didnt know ruutu was a vampire. ha

LEGAME58 said...



meecrofilm said...

Just for the record, if some douche wearing nasty, sweaty gloves sticks his finger in my mouth, you better believe I'm chomping down on that shit.

TheNWChica said...

Great post Staff! I love the little Asian boy!

Jakke, Jakke, Jakke...what the fuck are we going to do with you? *facepalm*

There's some leeway given for the Finns and the batshitness; but he was never like this in Pittsburgh or Vancouver. I think something has finally snapped in his brain.

Oh, and Rusty? Popping Colby in the chin makes me love you even more than I did before!

vital beach said...

Carrot jobbing = epic

That deserves its own recap. I thought I was seeing things when that was going on live.

Good win, but it's Atlanta. I can't feel THAT good about beating a team that features Crusher as its top center. Oh well, hope this gets the ball rolling.

Also, I can't comprehend what HCMT is doing right now. No Wallace? Eaton leading the team in ice time? Really?

Letang Buries It said...

So uplifting to see 3 goals in one game. I will say I'm a touch distressed about Tank and Pascal leaving the game. A win is a win though.

Apparently carrot girl escaped from Ummpa Lumpa land and got herself some growth hormone, unreal. I'm really hoping that's not a side effect of some strange medical condition that will make me regret my laughter.

Go Pens!

nicholas richter said...

Steigerwald and Phil Collins look alike.. also... that scoreboard picture... if you read the dodge advertisement and the dicks advertisement it looks like it says "Grab Dicks" is this scoreboard sponsored by Charlie? WTF?

Nulpher said...

"The rest of the game was shorter than our time left on blogspot."

Hmm... hinting at a new site?

Julia said...

@ Eileenover.. I completely agree with you!

& seriously you guys jobbing that guy made my night!

BlacknGold66 said...

Reading the carrot part while listening to "One more night" had me squirt at least 2 drops of pee out. Fucking unreal.

Pens score on the PP and I'm off the couch celebrating... meanwhile my girlfriend is saying "Holy shit rewind that crap! Wait til you see these assholes making out. {short pause} What. The. Fuck??"


Oh, and for "special someone" celebrating etiquette you always high five.

Unless it's the playoffs...

...then you just hug the living shit out of everyone.

nicholas richter said...

also "Ruutu bites Peters" another Charlie sponsored post...

penstone said...

the Asian kid made my night. even more so than winning.

I still can't believe Phil-fucking-Collins is the gameday man. holy shit. and I agree wholeheartedly with BnG: Reading the carrot part while listening to "One more night" had me squirt at least 2 drops of pee out. Fucking unreal
WOW. just, WOW. stick to high fives or hugs only, please..

nuthinhere said...

Damn, now I have to dig out that Phil Collin's CD, haven't listened to it in a while.

What the hell was up with the orange chick?? She needs to layoff the tanning bed. Would this qualify as hot chicks with douchebags?

meecrofilm said...

Nulpher said...
"The rest of the game was shorter than our time left on blogspot."

Hmm... hinting at a new site?

Interesting indeed. We demand to be enlightened!

vital beach said...


To my understanding, a HCwDB requires both components, a HC and a DB. Maybe if she allows her skin to return to a tint one would generally associate with a human (if that's even a possibility at this stage) we'll talk. But not now.

mak108 said...

I can remember during game 1 of the flyers series last year, when Malkin had that breakaway short hander we jumped up, I grabbed my girlfriend, and shook her while screaming WOOOOOOOOO!!!


penstone said...

Is it bad to admit that I started listening to Phil Collins on youtube now, thanks to "One More Night"?? "can't hurry love, noooo you just have to wait.." "I can feel it coming in the air tonight, oh Lord"..
uhhhm, yeah, I must be drunk again..

and Peters deserves an best actress Oscar for his performance after Ruu bit him. Does Ruu have shark teeth or something? I mean, I know it couldn't have been pleasant getting bit by Jarkko Ruutu but how could he have hurt his hand that bad through a hockey glove? I blame the glove.

jefe p said...

sounds like the best game i havent watched yet. dont u hate when youre trying not to see the score at a bar and bam u look up for a split second and its right there on the ticker.

wow if recaps are gonna be this truthful and hilarious, pens can keep winning.

fuck the police.

TheFandangler said...

Phil Collins is gay. No matter what is said.

Sussudio is his best song, mainly because Leland Sklar is the bassist in the video.

Killer hair/beard combo.

Jordan Staal is dump.

KaylaJ said...

heh, we were talking about that kiss in the chat saying how he had probably been scoring about as much as the pens had. def an odd look to it all around


seriously, if lehtonen ends up on a good team, i sure hope its in the west. i like him, but hate when the pens play him cause he knows how to keep a crappy team in a game. i'm glad his teammates never showed up as much as they could have esp in the 3rd

as for tyson, peters need to calm down. i mean you were supposedly bit on the glove by jarkko ruutu, not bruce the shark.

finally in phx, i like walker's face when jovo looks up bleeding, he's like "oh crap"

Nulpher said...

Also, forgot to mention it earlier, I bet that the carrot will email tPB sometime tomorrow. It always happens when we job someone.

TheFandangler said...

Fucking Carrots.

My bro and I used to have the conversation of what umpa lumpas were birthed from...

We were watching the game together and as soon as that shit hit the screen it was a simultaneous look at each other, back at the TV, then back at each other saying. "THAT'S IT!"... "Holy Fucking pathetic shit, that's it".


TheFandangler said...

She Should be with "Fung"...


stokes said...

It should be a rule that goals are celebrated by double high fives, no matter who you are attending with. Unless it's Jim Abbott; then you have to slap his one hand twice.

Unless it's the playoffs...

...then you just hug the living shit out of everyone.

No one mentioned that joke in front of The Carrot with his hat on crooked? what a complete tool.

sven butenschon said...

@ fandangler
Everytime I see that pic it puts me into a full on rage
I honestly think that is a picture of snyr

J.S. said...

What is up with that color of orange? You're in Pittsburgh. In January. You're not fooling anybody. And maybe I'm getting the wrong idea, but is there a four foor cushion between them and everybody else? To use a quote from Office Space: "Hey you two, get a room!" (throws up the finger)

I also thought I'd mention this to show how well this place is represented. I tried grabbing an anthem pic, but couldn't grab my phone or camera in time. I can't remember when it was (1st INT maybe), but at one point it was mentioned that they were both pensblog readers and that they were the winners of the tickets from the MLF fundraiser from last month. It was definitely fun talking with them, and maybe we'll bump into each other at another TPB event.

Vinnie said...

Blogger PittHockey said...

jobbing the guy kissing the carrot = best part of the recap

Agree. I couldn't stop laughing when I saw her and immediately was reminded of Ramming Speed's "Carrot Attack":

You come from light years away
With your fake orange tan
You look like a carrot zombie
Who arrived in a tin can

Your space pods
Gave you a shiny new glow
Soon cancer will be all that you know

Beware of the carrot attack
These fake n bake creatures will surely attack
So beware of their unnatural skin tone
Look them in the eyes you'll turn to stone

You come from light years away
With your fake orange tan
You look like a carrot zombie
Who arrived in a tin can
Carrot Attack! Carrot Attack!

Bob Brett said...

John Anderson = The White Shadow

demondg1 said...

That chick would have been hot if she didn't look like an Oompa Loompa goddess. What a douche that guy is. Nice shirt. Douche.

And the kid watching them go at it is just creepy. Nice hat future douche of America.

Colby was everywhere last night. Seemed like he got more ice time than Letonen.

We need the Michel Therrien Radar from Puck Huffers. Trade them Miyagi if you have to. It must be done.

Ruutu biting Peters, probably not the first time a Senator has used their teeth with an appendage in their mouth. That said, I still love that Finnish bastard.

Steve In Denver said...

Best recap ever.

And for those of you who admit to owning a Phil Collins cd, let me introduce you to my balls.

dying alive said...

Winning this game is like beating Jim Abbott in rock-paper-scissors.

Oh my GOD. People are starting to wonder what I'm doing over here, laughing out loud at my desk.

I'm not sure that carrot girl's skin tone is due entirely to a tanning bed. I think she may be supplementing with the spray-on tan. That's the only way I've ever seen someone turn that shade of orange.

dying alive said...

Oh, and for this morning's "oh, please" moment, check out Puck Daddy's dishonorable mentions:

Oh, please.

Really? We get it, you don't like the guy. Pretty much anyone who isn't a Pens fan or from Nova Scotia thinks he's some kind of super villain. But you're stretching a bit here, Greg-o. What is he supposed to say?

Sprout said...

Man, you guys are dicks.

That's my sister in that picture. It's bad enough that she's dating that loser, but making fun of her skin is fucked up.

I'll bet she's healthier than all you losers.

And next time you slug down a V8, I hope you think of her, and her skin.


Xerone said...

I had fun at the game, but sadly I missed out on The Carrot. Seats weren't exactly the best for seeing anything, but the ice.

I couldn't even see the scoreboard. >.<

Raybin said...

Actually, Sprout, I'd figure your sister's skin would be green.

Sprout said...

Our mom is the carrot from Veggie Tales, dick.

Raybin said...

Our mom is the carrot from Veggie Tales, dick.

Hahahahaha! Well played, my friend.

So when the Jolly Green Giant says "HO HO HO" is he laughing or referring to your female family members?


Hooks Orpik said...

What a recap. I can't believe that douche's "beard" didn't get jobbed. Wow.

M. Vanderlasser said...

Ah, that was a good one, for sure.

Let the rampage begin!

BNG is correct - regular season goal celebrations = high fives, post-season = hugs, Sykora hat tricks = leaping from seat, pouring beer all over boss (if you're reading this, I'm sorry, Mr. Khan).

Phil Collins = suprise of the season so far.

AC/DC is setting up at the Igloo right now - 17 tractor trailers full o' gear!

Thrashers Recaps said...

I posted a "Pens Blog" post about this game on my blog

demondg1 said...

@Hooks Orpik

You are correct sir. That dudes beard needs jobbed. There's just so much going on in that moment that it got lost in the shuffle. Let me say that it is a true douche beard. It is the facial equivalent of his shirt. The whole package was put together for maximum douchedom with a side of asswipe.

DCPensFan said...

It's been years since I've heard a good Jim Abbott joke.

And this blog is the only thing that kept me remotely sane the past week.

7 points back from the division leaders. but let's start with 2 wins in a row first.

Matt said...

Cheer up, Thrashers Recaps. You still have the Falcons.

[Kurt Warner]

Gorio said...

Oh man oh man oh man... I was waiting for my friend to come out of the bathroom during the second intermission when who walks up to the line? Carrot girl. And I was absolutely perplexed by her outfit. Her orange skin definately complimented her grey skin tight dress, silver sparkly leggings, teal high heels with grey legwarmers around the backs of them.

I could not stop staring at her through sheer amazement. Her "partner" then showed up and probably thought I was checking her out or wanted to buy crack from him

By the time my friend came out there was a group of like six of us just staring at this girl and wondering if she even knew what hockey was.

akus said...

@Thrashers recap,
Ummm, if that is in a Pensblog "style" one thing is missing.

Comments 0

wilsmith said...

Yeah, the chin-strap is what needs to be jobbed.

If you have a fat face, like that guy, dont grow a chin-strap. Actually, as a rule of thumb, you should never grow a chins-strap.

If anyone on here has one, stop reading and leave.

P.O. said...

that poor kid probably just hit puberty and grew that chin strap and then threw on that super cool affliction shirt he got for Christmas.. you know he looked at himself in the mirror and thought... damn i look good

good for him

PSUPensFan said...

When I was watching the game last night and Carrot Face and Shirt Boy showed up on the screen I couldn't believe my eyes. I sat next to that girl at the Boston game last Tuesday. When I first got to the game, I made a bathroom pitstop before heading to my seat and there she was standing before the mirror putting on makeup in high heels, furry pink jacket and a sequin skirt. My first thought was "who goes to a hockey game dressed like that?" I then proceeded to my seat only to find that, out of 17,000+ possible people who could be sitting next to me, it was HER! AND, to top off the sequined skirt, she made a fancy glitter and sequined sign to hold up..."My New Year's Resolution is to help Geno Score." She wasn't sitting with anyone...I guess she didn't want any competition. We were sitting in the first row of B15 and she held up her sign the whole time. During the third period she moved down to A and was sitting with "Shirt Boy." I could never forget that ugly mug of his...he might have had a choice shirt on that night too, but we couldn't see because he was wearing a jacket. I think we saw her one last time as we were leaving the arena standing on the ramp above where the players leave, holding her bright shiny sign.
Thanks for sharing those guys are the best!

dying alive said...

teal high heels

Without even discussing the fact that they were teal, I don't get this. I see girls at the game all the time in high heels and it boggles my mind. Between the stairs in the parking garage, slogging up Centre avenue, tons of oafish feet in the narrow concourses and the stairs to get to the seats, wearing heels to a hockey game would be a recipe for a broken ankle for me. Or at least a couple of smashed toes. I wear heels to work every day (I have to or my pants drag on the ground - the beauty of being a near-midget), but I'm sure as hell not wearing them to a hockey game. Ah, the North American Puck Bunny.

akus said...

Forget the carrot, what is more disturbing is the "couple" in front. I bet it's a double date.

How old is he.
LCB card? No way! Driver's license....maybe he just got the book for the questions.
Library card, i would bet on it.

She has shoes older than him.

I think with this "couple" high five's, should have been encouraged.

Anything PINK should not be allowed @ The Mellon.
( see Let's Go Pens, sign)

btw, from last post
i like the smooth look.
save the beard for the playoffs.

kstewy16 said...

That girl was seriously the orangest person I've ever seen.
Thats pathetic.
Anyway, Sid should play in front of the net every PP and let Geno be the QB. Sid is easily the best at deflections that the pens have, and he's big enough and tough enough to stand in there, unlike others.(see Satan, Miroslav)

Also I was complaining about this during the game, Staal does not deserve a single minute of PP time. And how does MT even justify it? He has his "I play the hot hand" speech every night, and Sykie was the hot hand, he should have been there.

Ricky said...

I kind of miss Sharkko Ruutu, excuse me, Jarkko.

kevinstevenswhore said...

the thrashers coach looks like michael caine.

smithda said...

My husband and I actually did a rewind to laugh at the slutty Oompah-loompah.

Joey said...

Don't know if someone said it already in the thick of these damn comments... I remember reading that certain types of birth control turn you fucking orange whenever you tan.

Case-in-point, carrot face.

Aubrey said...

@ ricky-
i'm gonna start calling him sharkko, that's hilarious

that picture of orange girl just contained way too much douchiness for me to handle....the color, the beard, the other couple...too much, just part of the recap for sure. Now I have the damn oompa loompa song in my head!

Phil Collins coming through against all odds....that's fantastic.

RedWings said...

Carrot Chick and Abbott. Absolutely hilarious. Plus, everything's funnier after a wind.

Congrats on getting off the snide.

Stilly said...

Good win last night. Hopefully the win carries over into the next game...

Regarding d-bag and carrot girl. Just like many other here, I don't believe I've ever seen someone so orange.

d-bag's shirt might be the second gayest shirt I've ever seen behind anything out of Ovechkin's clothing line.

RedWings said...

Oops... wind=win.

Although I've heard some funny wind, too.

Stilly said...


Good call on the score last night. What a prediction.

Matt said...

I thought the Thrashers' coach kind of looked like the German with long blonde hair in the original Die Hard. The one who ends up getting shot by the cop from Family Matters.

akus said...


On the anthem that a chicken. a peep..........a Baby Pen?......

@Thrashers recap,
what kind of bird is that wearing a Thrashers shirt? I didn't think a brown thrasher looked like that,unless they eat lots of carrots or use a tanning spray.


@Dying Alive,
Puck Daddy must not know the meaning of, it's not personal, it's just business.

Maybe i need more coffee.

RedWings said...


Thank you. I wondered if anyone would remember that.

71crush said...

Thrashers coach reminds me of Stellan Skarsgaard...

We sat near Jeff Jimmerson, it was awesome!!

I saw several girls in super high heels , sequiny outfits, one girls winter coat had short sleeves...??? I just dont get it...

RedWings said...

Anderson looks like Jack Niclaus to me. Which makes sense. After all, Atlanta will have the longest golf season in the NHL this year.

kstewy16 said...

Attack of the Puck Bunnies!!!!!!!

That really needs to be a photoshop...

dying alive said...

People who make out in public are gross whether they're orange or not. Congratulations, you've been to first base. Act like you've been there before.

RedWings said...

dying alive said...
People who make out in public are gross whether they're orange or not. Congratulations, you've been to first base. Act like you've been there before.


Vince Lombardi would be proud.

Aubrey said...

@dying alive-
carrot girl doesn't need to work so much on acting like she's been there before, but needs to work more on acting like she HASN'T been there so many times :)

akus said...

Others remembered as well, they posted after the game, in the last post.

I read that Conks made some sweet saves last night on his SO.

Ok tell me who writes this shit and I hope the Pens don't read press clippings,

From the AP:
For one night, the Pittsburgh Penguins looked like the talented team that went to the Stanley Cup finals last season.

I think he/she should have wrote for two periods, the Pittsburgh Penguins...

dying alive said...

@ aubrey - Ha ha, so true.

Also, Barf. Anyone care to guess what the primary focus of that discussion will be?

Matt said...

Wow, when did he become such a homo?

I'm guessing once you get a dedicated contingent of Flyers/Caps fans, you kind of have to keep up this stuff to get more hits.

dying alive said...

Well, I know I'll be tuning in. There's nothing I value more than the opinions of armchair coaches who have absolutely no insight into the organization coupled with bitter creeps with morbid Crosby fascinations.

RedWings said...

@ akus...

Thanks, too. And yes, Conks was unbelievable last night. The Wings came out slow and the BJ's were blowing past them (you knew there had to be a reference, eh?).

Conklin kept 'em in it through the first with two spectacular stops and a lucky post. The Wings picked up their play but that Steve Mason is one hell of a net minder for Columbus. Fortunately, the PP bailed 'em out twice in the third and then Zetterberg got the empty netter after a 40 foot kick assist from a stickless Datsyuk.

I tell ya, Conklin has been HUGE all season while Osgood still recovers from his SC Hangover.

Matt said...

I was really sad to see Conkblock go. He was so clutch for the Penguins when Fleury went down. The goaltending tandem Detroit uses is the best career move for him, though. Hopefully when we play the Wings in February, Conk stays on the bench.

akus said...

@ Matt,
PD, lovesslobbers over the Devils.

Matt said...

Yeah, I knew he was a Devils fan, which makes the dicksuckery of the Flyer/Cap mindset harder to comprehend.

demondg1 said...

Deus Ex Oompa Loompa just landed a reference on Puck Daddy.

wrecking_ball said...

Second the call for a Carrot Photoshop jobbing.

Western Penn. women ... gotta love 'em. That photo montage is a buzzkill and a half.

/moved away at young age

dying alive said...

Um, speaking as a Western PA woman, that girl is not representative of us as a whole. I'm pretty sure there is a "overtanned hooch" segment of the population in every part of the world.

Rba said...

Western PA women look nothing like that, i hope, or else when i move back im slightly fucked lol.

Ahh i miss home.

wilsmith said...

Would Sykora see power play time if he were French-Canadian?

Cierra said...

On Carrot Girl -

I see her in the rush line all the time. She always has a nauseatingly bright sign (usually pink and so full of glitter you can barely read it) for Malkin. One that I've seen asks him for a ride, and another asked Santa to make her Mrs. Malkin for Christmas. Vomit. And her douche boyfriend HELPS HER MAKE THEM. Probably for the potential bragging rights of telling people his girlfriend screwed Malkin.

She's one of those people that chases him down the road when he leaves, hoping to catch him at the red light. One time she got to his car just as it turned green and he floored it. Meanwhile, she almost got hit.

The next time I saw her, Malkin turned at the light and she ran after him, leggings flashing in the glow from the streetlights, followed by Douche and the rest of her dumb friends.

She's something, all right.

dying alive said...

Meh. Madden hinted at the French-Canadian bias on his show yesterday (which I don't care for, but he talks hockey) but I'm not buying it. Talbot sees no power play time, and Dupuis isn't on the first unit. Both have been demoted to the fourth line at various points, so no bias there.

Unless you're referring to Boucher, I'm kind of at a loss on that one but I get the impression that he's in the lineup more for veteran presence than nationality.

akus said...

Good Points

kstewy16 said...

Will Smith FTW!!

And Cierra, you're story is great, although it would have been better had she been hit by a car...

dying alive said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
dying alive said...

I'm probably going to be embarrassed at not knowing/remembering this, but can someone please explain the "You're doing it, Petr" photoshop to me?

Raybin said...

@dying alive

It's from the movie "Hook."

Robin Williams plays Peter Pan who left Neverland as a boy and subsequently blocked out all memory of that and grew up to be a stuffed shirt business man.

Well through a series of events he ends up back in Neverland with the Lost Boys. He needs a happy thought to be able to fly and is having trouble doing it.

Finally when he starts to be able to fly and act like Peter Pan again, one of the lost boys (the child pictured) says, "You're doing it Peter."

I may have some of the details's been literally 10 or 12 years since I've seen "Hook." But that's the gist.

dying alive said...

@ Raybin - Ha ha, thanks. I've never seen Hook because I can't stand Robin Williams, but it's a solid reference.

BeatenlikeaRentedMule said...

To Comment on the Douche/Carrot Girl...Not only does the douche have a chin strap, but the third picture of them makes me believe he either has a bowl cut or a fade. Either way, I nearly took a "Stunned" picture of myself sitting on the couch watching these two and sent it in.

akus said...

Puck Daddy's live blog comments are LOL.

dying alive said...

I gave up on trying to read the PD live chat because it kept scrolling to the end when I was trying to browse the posts. Annoying. From what I could tell, though, it went something like this:

WingsFan: LOL Pens Suxxors!
PhlyerPhan: LOL Crosby Suxxors!
CapsFan: *generic Cindy Crosby joke*
RagsFan: *generic Crosby ball-punching joke*
*giant circle jerk with no intelligent discourse*

On a scale of 1-10, am I close?

meecrofilm said...

The live blog is definitely joke city.

On another note....

You wanna see ORANGE?

demondg1 said...


FUNG! He's my favorite doucebag.

J.S. said...

I'd say probably a 2/10 on Sid jobbing since I missed the first few minutes. The chat wasn't that bad. Saw a few people from here in there. Kstewy, Rage, Staff, and Charlie all made apperances, not to mention a few cameos from Ray Shero.

I had a few things posted, but should I be the proudest of being the one who Rickroll'ed the chat. :)

J.S. said...

neither one of those "hot chicks" are really all that hot, but I guess the douchebagginess of the two douchebags evens things out.

kstewy16 said...

RickRolling puck daddy was a classic.

I still don't believe he doesn't hate the pens.

akus said...

Wyshynski: Funny part is that despite the bite, the Penguins would take Jarkko back in a milisecond.

That is funny.

Matt said...

@da - On the scale from 1 to 10, you're up at around 12. I try to read as little as possible because I value my sanity, and anger flashes only serve to shorten my lifespan.

Also, Hook was on AMC recently, or is going to be on very soon. I love that movie.

Rufio! Rufio! Ru! Fi! OOOOOOOOOO!

cs2766 said...

There's great remorse by carrot girl in the bottom two pictures.

BlacknGold66 said...

@Akus: No way the Pens would take Sharkko back. We have this Matt Cooke.

And how much can be said for the performance of WilSmith last night? Dude shaved the beard for a slump-buster. Commit to the Will.

Dan T said...

The orange chick made my night but also reminded me of a game I went to earlier in the season. I was sitting behind this guy who had to be 19-20 who was taking (what I thought was his 15 year old sister) this girl on a date. It was a full blown make-out session right in front of me the whole game. There is no way she was older than 18 and there was no way he was younger than 18.

To finish my story...I was jealous


sven butenschon said...

from PD 's blog

@ Ryan H this isn't a Pens blog. Just the Pens have a lot of interesting players, all with something that is blogworthy(that probably isn't as word). Infact the Pens fans only really come out when they are winning or someone from DET reminds who they beat last year. However don't expect Wyshynski to pile it on the Pens like he would do with other teams as I'm pretty certain he very affraid of The Pensblog people waging a war he can not win.

Thats awesome

This Just in AO still a douchebag

Any work on Fed Tank?

dying alive said...

I thought the general concensus on Ruutu was "thanks for the memories." Why would we not be totally satisfied with Cooke, who does pretty much the same job with less stupid penalties and more offensive upside?

I heard on the radio last night that this is the Pens' annual trip with their dads. I wonder if they're just going to Nashville and Colorado, or if they get the joy of experiencing Philly as well?

KD said...

@ DA
1) I'm glad I'm not the only one who doesn't really like Madden, but still listens for the hockey talk.

2) Thanks for asking about the "You're doing it, Petr" reference, because I didn't get it either...

demondg1 said...

The next game I'm going to is Jan. 20th. I pray to Jesus, FSM, and Raptor Jesus that Carrot Face and Douche-Nozzle McChinstrap is there. I need to witness her orange glow in person.

Funny how she became an internet meme in less than 24 hours.

Rage said...

"...anger flashes only serve to shorten my lifespan."

Totally untrue. My bitter hatred and anger will keep me alive long after my enemies have all died so that I may dance(piss) on their graves at their funerals.

I'd love to have Ruutu back on the Pens. Seriously.

fleuryous said...

Phil. Fucking. Collins.

Scuderi has stolen my heart, and I probably wouldn't have it any other way.

I was talking to meecro at the game, and we both said we were wondering what was going on in cblog...glad to see less jumpers.

Hope Dups and Fed are okay.

@ wilsmith:

"Yeah, the chin-strap is what needs to be jobbed."

My friend and I were just talking about how truly distasteful they are. Abe Lincoln rocked that shit, though...the main word being "Abe Lincoln."

Gill and Goligoski hopefully play the next game. And Wallace would be nice. I miss Gill's big foot.


(is from a place where too many girls look like Oompa Loompas. True story.)

Matt said...

Note to self, don't make enemies with Rage. I could do without my grave getting peed on.

No word just yet on Fedotenko/Dupuis. Just the same "broken hand" and "lower body injury" theorized last night.

Cierra said...

I forgot to mention she also has a Malkin jersey signed "to sexy girl"...

Lord, help us.

akus said...

I know ,i guess i shoulda used these things, " " before Wyshynski and after millisecond.

I agree with the beard, save it for the playoffs.


Rage is a pussy cat, in a dickish kind of way.

Matt said...

@Cierra - You know Ovechkin would have at least made out with her by now.

crmzak said...

The "You're doing it, Petr" PS is one of my faves, gives me goosebumps thinking back to that game. Awesome! (to whoever did that one)

Speaking of Conkblock, I feel he is actually more deserving of a mention when any of those announcers/jokes uses their typical "this is where it hurts the Pens to no longer have a Hossa or Malone" analogies.
He was our luckbox last season when we were in desperate need of one.

I'm pissed about Dupuis. He's been on fire lately. Sad to see him out of the lineup if that's the case.

BlacknGold66 said...

@Akus: Me not seeing that it wasn't you saying it... TOTAL FAIL on my part.


Oh, and in regards to Western PA girls/women...

Pittsburgh and surrounding areas does have an exceptional number of good looking women. The problem is that for every 3 really attractive women in Pittsburgh there is the girl with the fake bake AND bleach blond hair. That or the lady that is stuck in 1983.

Cleveland's is for every 3 attractive women there is one girl with fake bake and fashionable clothes that is 50 lbs. overweight.

Every region has there version of fake bake skank.

Except for Philly.... they're all trash.


M. Vanderlasser said...

Mike L. goal calls and fight analysis from last night...>

meecrofilm said...


Fuck Fung.

akus said...

The Ukrainian THUNDER!!!

Dr. Turkleton said...

Just for the record, if some douche wearing nasty, sweaty gloves sticks his finger in my mouth, you better believe I'm chomping down on that shit.

Jarkko RuuChew.

Just hope for Ruu's sake that Peters isn't a member of the Moises Alou Club.

bitter old man rant:

along the same line as Carrot Topette + Chin Strap Douche...

For those 20-somethings at the Mellon who get their puss on the Kiss Cam - don't embarrass yourself. I'm sure that your Sheetz-Denny's-Community College lifestyle is great and that your 5 seconds of fame on the Mellon Jumbo is truly a life-changing moment...but, just remember: We're not laughing WITH you, we're laughing AT you.

Nice to get 2 points from the NHL's version of the Washington Generals...let's see if this can build some MO in the next 7 games versus legit competition, before the All-Star Break.

[Big Mac Attack]

M. Vanderlasser said...

What do J. Ruutu and S. Struthers and J. Dahmer have in common?

eileenover said...

I'm praying that Carrot Girl is at the Red Wings game. Our c-blog group would have a field day.

frank said...


mark madden is saying that therrien is getting fired and the pens are hiring pat quinn. that would be CRAZY

Rage said...

...and that's why I don't listen to that guy. He exists only to feed the yinzers

TheFandangler said...

The new ASG jerseys are worse than last years.

dying alive said...

Yesterday he said that there was no way Therrien was going to be fired.

P.O. said...

i really hope that jerkoff is wrong about this one.. me and a bunch of people i know are big HCMT backers

Matt said...

Chew on this.

And yeah, the ASG jerseys are a little terrible.

sven butenschon said...

@ M. Vanderlasser
I think you are remembering the joke wrong
It goes what do Ruutu Synr and capsnut all have in common?

They all had Peter in their mouth last night

meecrofilm said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Allison said...

@meecro- masturbating to amy winehouse- that is priceless.

Allison said...

Ahhh, fuck, you deleated it now I look like a jack ass. Thanks meecro.

Allison said...

Ahhh, fuck, you deleated it now I look like a jack ass. Thanks meecro.

Raybin said...

Has anyone checked out the Mike Milbury SAS?

The awesome thing is there's hardly any sarcasm or humor or anything...just a list of the moves he pulled off as Isles GM. That is funny enough.

Allison said...

k great job to myself for the double posts and for not realizing theres a new post.

VAMOSN said...

Hey, this is the girl with the pic of the duck in the Pens jersey... response to your question about how do you celebrate with you partner: you high-five. Blufftalk (my fiance) and I high-five.

If you make out, you don't belong there. No matter how orange she is.

PS about the duck, his name is Bill, he wears a full Penguins uniform with jersey, pants, and a helmet. He took the helmet off because it was the anthem.

VAMOSN said...

FYI this was Bill's first game. he's 1-0. Did he break the streak?

Josh_Pens said...

quit deleting shit pussies

joseph burrell said...

in my opinion it was a very good game and a great victory and I even managed to make some money because I bet on the victory on a pay per head websites and since then I have been doing it and getting good money


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