Monday, December 8, 2008

Joke The Vote

Nothing going on.

Hopefully on your way to work you stopped and brought a pick six from Tony Romo.

What a mistake

Big game for the Pens tonight, against the jerkoff Buffalo Sabres.

While we're waiting for the game, we are going to have our first annual "Joke the Vote."

Normally this whole voting thing is whatev.
But, our quest to piss Montreal Fans off is almost complete.

Crosby is pulling away with number one in the All Star voting, but now Malkin needs our help.

Fans don't let friends get Saku Jokiu into the All Star game.
Koivu couldn't hold Malkin's jock. Does Alex Tanguay still play this season?

It is going to take an effort, but at 12:00pm today we are calling for everyone to take 3 seconds and vote for Malkin.

All you have to do is text Malkin to 81812.

There is probably some charge, but if you can't afford 99 cents, should you really even be reading this right now?

We're not sure how large of a dent we can make, but if it works, we can do it again.

High noon. Joke the Vote.

Do it.


gilette212 said...

pens recalled lovejoy... i think it's time for a new game day character to make his debut

brett said...

how does the all star game work again with goalies? Do the top 3 vote-getters from each conference play one period each? grr I'd have to vote for Giguere a whole bunch to knock Osgay out. I don't like either of them... gr!

Vote for Malkin at least 20 times today.

Allison said...

I'm sticking with my texting "PENS". Yes, it's giving two useless votes to gonch and whits, but at the same time it's a three for 1 deal for crosby, malkin, and fleury. However, at aprox 12 noon I will switch it up and text in a "MALKIN" just cause tPB told be to.

Allison said...

And just for reference, cause I know someone's gonna get all up in arms, our amazing malkin voting will not show up immediatly. It will take about an hour to show up in the tallys, so we'll have to be patient to stun Habs nation.

btumpak said...

@ gilette212

Reverend Lovejoy from Simpsons would be epic

go pens. buffa-lick-my-balls

71crush said...

I am dying laughing at that photoshop. Too hilarious. I voted for Geno about 200 times yesterday. If everyone could vote a few times he could jump up. :)

dying alive said...

Pretty sure that text voting is free, unless you don't have unlimited texting.

The fact that it would piss off anyone that Malkin would be an All-Star starter over Koivu, Tanguay and Kovy is a joke. Is there anyone on earth that could give logical reasons why he shouldn't start over any of those three? Besides Don Cherry, that is. I realize that it's a dumb exhibition game, but if they're going to do it, let's do it right.

Dukepuck20 said...

In honor of the call-up, Lovejoy's got a pretty entertaining blog. Hasn't been updated since November, but still worth the read.

meecrofilm said...


Just the highest-voted goalie starts. The other two aren't determined by voting.


I think you took everyone by surprise with that statement ;-)

Hocfan66 said...

Hey guys, anyone know when Ryan Whitney is due back? My initial guess was he'd be in the starting lineup by it still looking that way?

meecrofilm said...

Haven't heard anything new about Whittizle. The Toronto game may not be too far-fetched. Hopefully.

Also, anyone see this before? Pretty funny Brian Campbell commericial when he was still with the Sabres. Credit to Seth at Empty Netters with the find.

Everybody hates the Flyers

akus said...

KodakPhotoshop moments,

the one from yesterday,
Sid in the hat,
Was it only because the Cowboys were in town?.... * i hope*

and the one today,
Could someone tell me what those things are coming out of Crosby and Malkin's head.

Cherry is a fleshy fruit.

Since Sid is solid,I have been telling my text happy kid to vote Malkin, straight up.

meecrofilm said...

Oh, and more shit while I continue to monopolize C-blog.

According the Pens' site, Fleury practiced with the team this morning, and Gill didn't.

Fleury is also sporting a dirty 'stache

J.S. said...

Is it me, or was most of the Sens representin' for Charlie with the 'stache on Saturday?

...and that makes one more vote for Sid, Geno, Tal-bot, Orpik, Tanger, and MAF.


coffeytalk said...

Tomorrow on Joke the Vote,

please text last name: SCUDERI

THE Man only has 3,113 votes and I feel about 113 are from me and the other 3000 are from bng66.

Scuds Army, lets go!

Allison said...

Wooo, actually remembered to text vote for Gino, and made my friends I was with do it too. They couldn't really understand why they were texting "nonsence" to a weird number, but they did it nonetheless.

J.S. said...

as of 1204 EST, the voting looks like this:

KOIVU, Saku517841
(end of starting lineup)

TANGUAY, Alex - 510355
MALKIN, Evgeni - 488522

fleuryous said...

I vote for Scuds almost every time that I vote. Then, I vote Tanger. ALWAYS vote Orpik. I can't believe he's not up there yet!

In reference to the last post...Don Cherry looks like he's had more work done than Dolly Parton. He looks like a wax model, seriously.
I had to agree with his Avery critique, though...don't be a crybaby when you're matched up with someone twice your size. You don't see Tyler Kennedy pulling that shit, do you? He goes for the gold. Just fight, Avery--your face isn't that pretty to begin with.

Ugh, every time I see the "Avery screen" youtube on Brodeur, I want to vomit. Calling Brodeur "fat" is fine, until you get him in the steel cage. Brodeur could royally fuck him up.

Vote/Go Pens.

PS. Classic Romo reference.

coffeytalk said...

He called him fatso.

I have mad respect for Marty but I can't help but giggle when the Devils come to town cause in my head I hear "Pens vs. Fatso and the Devils tonight at Mellon Arena!"

dying alive said...

I've been voting for Scuds since day one, so count me in.

The "fatso" comment kind of makes me giggle, too. At a game last season some angry woman in the last row of the section yelled REALLY loudly, "Nice call, fatass!" at Koharski after he called a penalty on one of the Pens late in the game. To me, Don Koharski will forever be fondly known as "fatass."

fleuryous said...

My fault, he did call him "fatso"...which actually makes him look more immature. haha.

Does he forget that he's a grown man?
He actually has no reason to hate Brodeur, but Brodeur sure as hell has reason to dislike him, after that ridiculous display.

Avery hates him because Brodeur's career overshadows anything Avery could ever, Vogue, whateva whateva.

akus said...

Poster Boy for Krispy Kreme.

This ad is endorsed by Jim Schoenfeld.

debrisslide said...

Sooo, d-pairs:

As per Pens website, reporting that the USS did not participate in morning skate.

johnnylaw said...

Loved the photoshops. Romo's play last night reminded me of why he's the Steve Smith of the NFL. Only difference is, if that were a playoff game yesterday, he would have thrown 2 pick sixes would have fumbled another FG hold.

As for the game tonight, anyone know if Kotalik is playing? He and his dad are alright, and I'd totally do Ales' stepmom, no joke. Total SILF!


johnnylaw said...

Oh and if Tanguay or Koivu get in over Malkin, I will personally invade Quebec and have those fanboys shitting themselves before I make my first pit stop at Tim Hortons to pick up provisions.

Allison said...

@fleuryous- actually thoes two had some past altercations as well, so they have a history of disliking eachother, the "screening" incident really is the most popular and recent. However, I don't recall the specifics on the history, so avery *might* have a reason to dislike him too. Either way that fatso comment had my then boyfriend, non hockey fan, laughing at the immaturity of a grown man saying "I guess fatso didn't wanna shake my hand.". Priceless.

johnnylaw said...

Do you think Brodeur may have been banging Avery's gf along with his sister-in-law? If so, that's one bad mother fucker right there, even Samuel L. Jackson would have to agree.

dying alive said...

I wouldn't want to shake Avery's hand either. He looks like the type of guy who doesn't wash them after he uses the bathroom. You can ALWAYS tell.

somechic said...

TANGUAY, Alex 511466
MALKIN, Evgeni 490931

johnnylaw said...

I just voted, and it seems like not too many people give a shit about the western conference. Their leaders have half the votes of the EC leaders.

debrisslide said...

I just voted some more for Evgeni. Woooop.

coffeytalk said...

I vote for the western conference every time. There's a special place in my heart for Marty Turco. I vote for him just for the funny factor. When they mic him up, he's pretty hilarious.

What a maroon.

debrisslide said...

coffeytalk, I have a soft spot for Nabokov in the same way, though I can't figure out why.

somechic said...

yeah johnny noone's voted for hossa in a long time. But the call to arms was probably bumped malkins up 1000 votes within an hour or so....not bad

somechic said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
dying alive said...

Has anyone ever noticed how many starting goalies named Marty/Martin there are in the NHL? Just off the top of my head I can think of Brodeur, Turco, Gerber, and Biron. That's kind of a lot considering that there are only 30 teams and Marty isn't exactly as common as John or Bob.

coffeytalk said...

I rotate between Turco and Nabokov. I think San Jose might be my top Western Conference team. I don't follow them too closely but I like a lot of their players and I definitely root for them come playoff time. Until when or if they meet us 'guins 'n at.

urban said...

Even though, looking at the totals, it probably isn't going to happen - it'd be nice to get Ovechkin up there to bump the Canadiens out completely.

Plus, there's no reason at all that an all-star game shouldn't have Malkin-Crosby-Ovechkin as the starting line.

I propose a temporary peace bridge between Caps/Pens fans to run this thing. Then promptly demolish the bridge, of course.

inc.gillian said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Terri said...

I know we're all concerned about the NHL all-stars but are also some AHL all-stars we can vote for. The Penguins should be represented there as well.

Hip said...

We need Malkin to be in the starting lineup... and then score a hattie and add in a few assists during the game so that NBC is forced to interview him after and he can say, "ahh team plays good, I play ok, Sid is awesome, Ovie sucks" on National TV.

And then my secret fantasy will be complete.

Rally to the cause.

dying alive said... has an article about Crosby knocking off the all-Canadiens starting line-up.

To quote Nelson Muntz, ha ha.

holygoligoski said...

Tainted Love and Goose together?

This is going to be beautiful.

debrisslide said...

holygoligoski = best username ever.

akus said...

Even though, looking at the totals, it probably isn't going to happen

Two weeks ago today, Malkin was 121,963 votes behind Tanquay. Currently he is 19,592, two hours ago he was 21,833.

Never doubt the power.

urban said...

@akus - Valid point.

Someone reach out to the secret underground Caps fan headquarters. There's a big red phone for that, right?

Honestly, if all three of them were bumped out, none of them would probably even make the all-star game at all. That would be a nice karmic revenge for their shenanigans.

dying alive said...

Malkin is now just over 27K out of third place and I don't think the numbers have been updated in a while. They're exactly the same as they were about half an hour ago.

My captcha code the last time I voted: Trust Paterno. Weird.

fleuryous said...

I'd have to concur...holygoligoski is pretty money.

Well, regardless of what happened between Brodeur and Avery...both are scummy for different reasons...but Avery just looks like a douchebag on the ice.

I wouldn't shake his hand either. You saw Avery's teammate (I think it's Drury) tap him, and you imagine him saying "we want to win, but you're ACTUALLY being a huge tool."

If the Stars have an opportunity to trade him, I think they will--it sucks when nobody on your team respects you.

debrisslide said...

Who would trade anything for Avery, fleuryous? Maybe the Lightning would want him? They're all about getting random attention for shit that doesn't even matter.

pens fan in philly said...

its has gotten to the point that i laugh at every re-captcha that they give me... either i have voted too many times or i have studied way too long... im gonna go with the later and keep laughing

Molly said...

within the last minute i voted for geno 30 times.
anyone (i think) with verizon can type 81812 in 10 times, becuase you're allowed to send 10 at a time (at least on a chocolate, idk about the other phones).
then once it sends, just go to your outbox and click resend a bunch of times. i knocked off about 200 for sid the other day

Molly said...

here's the latest results:
CROSBY, Sidney 565135
KOVALEV, Alexei 522548
KOIVU, Saku 521589
TANGUAY, Alex 513975
MALKIN, Evgeni 495701

he only needs 25,889 votes to play!!!
we could easily get that if we all so what i just said (^^^)

akus said...

-18,274 and closing.

fleuryous said...

Well, I actually found this, because I'm avoiding studying...

"Tampa Bay's Jay Feaster said he had no room for Avery because he didn't seem to be a team player."

Yikes. He may have to intern at Vogue full-time.

Tooooooo bad.

pens fan in philly said...

keep in mind he has to pass koivu not just tanguay in order to start

sven butenschon said...

Geno picked up 13144 since this am

he is now 18k behind those douchebags
Lets get moving people

meecrofilm said...

Hahah. Pens players made Lovejoy lead the morning skate. Uncomfortable city.

meecrofilm said...

The stretch before the skate, I meant to say. derr.

pens fan in philly said...

lets get malkin to 500,000 today

meagan said...

i used all 500 of my out of verizon texts just to vote for malkin at exactly 12 today.

kstewy16 said...

Is it just regular texting cost for text voting? So like if I have unlimited it doesn't cost me a thing?
Cus if so I'll knock out a couple hundred votes for him during the game hahaha.

pens fan in philly said...

that type of dedication brings a tear to my eye

Fraer40 said...

Malking is about to break 500000

Do it

fleuryous said...

Holy Moly, Crosby is leeeeeading.

Decided to watch my 10 Greatest Games DVD...

A hat trick in 4:40.
Lemieux--what a human.

And it never gets old watching Hextall act like a 5-year-old.

It still astounds me that mullets were the dominant haircut of choice back then. Lemieux rocked it.

kstewy16 said...

Just knocked out 100 for the pens with texting, this shit better be covered by my plan, or malkin better score 10 goals in the ASG to make it worth the money.

TIMKO said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
TIMKO said...

malkin has cut the difference from 31285 to 24208

ben said...

we need to get fleury in too

crusher524 said...

How about a push to get Free Candy into the all-star game?

Malkin just 20k from getting in.

meecrofilm said...


There's a very simple reason why Malkin is currently leading the league in points..... ;-)

fleuryous said...

I've been voting like a madwoman for Orpik. I don't know if that'll make a difference, though--he's down by quite a bit, I do believe.

Malkin is movin' on up.

Can we relive this magic please?

fleuryous said...

haha, meecro...good call.

Nulpher said...

What's the 10 number alternative to 81812? The online free text service sites wont' recognize anything else.

Jersey Bill said...

13,294 behind. Do it.

mo0ch said...

i've been giving jordan staal the write in just to change it up.

PittHockey said...

radio team trying to steal credit for the jump in geno and sid votes.

not lange or bourque, but the intermission team

crusher524 said...

Malkin up to 4th, 4000 votes out. Suck it Montreal!

justin said...

No chance my friend, Saku Koivu deserves the all-star vote.


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