Sunday, August 10, 2008

Lets Make Gretzky's Head Bleed

Great movie.

As our associate [Melrose Rocks] points out.

Why doesn't everyone just stop what they are doing and celebrate Wayne Gretzky's ball sac.

Everyone from [] to [] is rehashing the "Great Homo's," trade from Oil country to LA.

The trade is one of the shadiest things in the history of the NHL.

Yes, by all accounts it really wasn't Gretzky's fault.
Owner Peter Pocklington was in big time trouble, Gretzky was scheduled to be a free agent, and being that he is driven by greed, he was surely going leave.

So Gretzky helped broker the deal himself.

The Oilers got 15 million in cash money, and all jobbers.

LA got Gretzky and his legend.

No question, it changed hockey in LA forever.

People said hockey wouldn't have existed in LA without #99, but that isn't true.
People still did go to Kings game.

LA has yet to fold their organization because Gretzky doesn't play there.

Something just seems fishing about the whole Wayne Gretzky trade.
Did it have to do with Gretzky's wife Janet Jones?
Some people say "don't bet on it." [Zing]
She was an actress, and really wanted to move to LA.

Although she got to move to LA, her career stayed in Edmonton.

Her [IMDB] page is used as waste paper in animal shelters across America.

And she is a degenerate gambler.

What does this all mean?


It just one of the many reasons we can't stand Wayne Gretzky.

So to celebrate our contempt for the "Great Homo," we are going to issue our first Photoshop Expo in almost 6 months.


"The Wayne Gretzky Sucks Photoshop Expo"

The task is simple, make photoshops that depict Wayne Gretzky in a negative way or just make fun of him.

Deadline is August 24th.

Email the 'shops to

Time to sharpen the Photoshop skills.

Go Pens


BlacknGold66 said...

Do it.

I Have Kasparaitis said...

Hahaha!! This is going to be hilarious ...

Nature Boy said...

Is he brown? Is cute? Swingersblog what a movie.

sh0ez said...

Oh boy. Time to do some Photoshopping!

For anyone who remember me posting my IHA Jerseys, I finshed one completely tonight. I was upset with the logos that made the cut and the ones that were chosen as the final ones, but one artist submitted late entries that could not be voted on since the polls were over. They rule, so I used them. Here are my Philadelphia Titans jerseys:

Philly Titans Home Jersey.

Philly Titans Away Jersey.

Philly Titans Alternate Jersey.

I like the third jersey.


Anthony said...

The Pensblog is fuckin' money, baby.

StillsandNash said...

Multiple posts in one day is a awesome... even if most of them are Winter in the Sun. Gretzky contest will be sick!

CFA Angels said...

I've been pledging for months that if I win the Powerball, I'm going to bid on the naming rights for the new Pittsburgh arena and name it the "Gretzky Sucks Center."

Buries It rules.

So does The Pensblog.

The Big K said...

Big K clocking in with the eight comment, continuing his streak of top ten comments.

Hip said...

Hi Big K!

I'm in a sour ass mood since the USA just let their quarterfinal bid slip away with some bullshit foul in extra time... GRRRRRR.

Can't wait for the Gretzky sucks PS expo. I mean, seriously can't wait. He bothers me.

J.S. said...

I already have a few ideas. It's just a matter of finding the right pics.

Brian said...

Sorry guys, but I have to respect the man's hockey talent above all else.

Mario was better, but still, we're talking about the 2nd or 3rd best hockey player in NHL history.

Jeffry said...

best photoshop expo ever

J.S. said...

I'll get it started.

If going out of your way to laugh at hurricane victims isn't "depicting Wayne Gretzky in a negative way", then I don't know what is.

coffeytalk said...


J.S. said...

I've tried a few different searches, like Gretzky Laugh, Gretzky Smile and Gretzky cartoon, and each time I get the Gretz/Newcomer pic that links back to here.

Pensblog Staff said...

JS that is money

Hip said...

oh brian, no one's disrespecting his hockey skillz here...

SexyChubbs said...

Seriously, when a Pensblog starts off with a Swingers clip, my day is perfect.

I don't care if it's August, that was a solid post!

Rage said...

Gretzky had skill, but if the Pens took Sid/Geno and surrounded them with tough guys who started a major brawl any time another player brushed them, can you imagine what their stats line would look like? Face it...dude was a coddled bitch.

Rage said...

oh, and nice job on the sweeeeeet clip

brndlynn said...

a swingers clip and gretzky ps expo made getting up this morning so much better. i cant wait to see what everyone comes up with.

Stoosh said...

Your daily countdown motivator.

J.S. said...

It's a damn shame that I can't get the gretz cartoon to match up with anything. Maybe I'll think of something later

my last one before I pack for my trip. back to NY again.

click me

J.S. said...

lol @ the bromance, stoosh

akus said...

I am not a PS'er, but found these on Gretzky, if it helps.


Flyer Hater said...

Gretzky can't hear you, he's got 4 Stanley Cup Rings plugging his ears.

Flyer Hater said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Flyer Hater said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Flyer Hater said...

Is there anybody out there?

brndlynn said...

fh: your links arent showing any pics.

I Have Kasparaitis said...

@Flyer Hater: I saw your first link with Gretzky and the Kings deal ... is it not working now?

Flyer Hater said...

For some reason, my motivational posters only show up on my computer. Everywhere else, it's an epic fail.

Predsboy18 said...

Gretz was a great player, no doubt. But look at the players he had. Messier, Kurri, Coffey, Anderson, and as mentioned before, guys who would kick someone's ass for lookin at Gretz wrong, there's no surprise that he had the production he did. Best fact of that though, is that after Wayne was traded, everyone thought they would go to shit, but they won 2 years later.

What bugs me about this, is that he's always credited with bringing hockey to the south. NO HE DIDN'T!!! He made hockey popular in LA, and all the leeches came to the games JUST to be seen, not because they actually LIKED hockey. It's like the Lakers, most of the celebrities would ditch the team if they went in the toilet. And now, you don't see nearly the celebrity presence in LA that you did in the 90s, and guess what, hockey is STILL around in the south! I will admit, it's a hard sell in most places, but you're going against YEARS of not having high level hockey.

Yes, I respect Gretzky, that doesn't mean I have my walls covered, and worship him. Because as we all know, there would be no hockey in the US if Pocklington hadn't traded him. Right?

(and BTW, wouldn't it be interesting if he had been traded to Detroit, as was his other team of choice?)

I still say Mario would have kicked his ass if he were healthy, and had the players Gretz did. The #66 might be the one retired by the NHL. A boy can dream, can't he?

Flyer Hater said...

Preds, or you can turn that around. Anderson and Kurri (the two players that played mostly with Gretzky) had major dropoffs after he left Edmonton. Hell, Kurri would spend the rest of his career chasing Gretzky around the league like a lost puppy.

Predsboy18 said...

Agreed on Kurri.

Anderson became an "unsung hero" on the 94 Rangers, which translates to "he didn't do much on the ice, but the guys knew he was in the room." (This may be my favorite hockey term)

Kurri was just sad. Respect him, but he hung on longer than he should have. Sorta like Jordan coming back to play for the Wiz.

DJ Burdick said...

Those are some of the best moments in the entire Swingers movie when they're playing SEGA NHL whatever the hell year it is. Wayne Gretzky
"is so f-ing cheap in this game"


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