Saturday, April 5, 2008

There Will Be Blood

These three teams are all in the playoffs,
and the Pens will be playing one of them in the first round.



Ottawa is reeling. They have lost Alfredsson and Fisher for a while.
If they hadn't started the season 15-2, they wouldn't even be here.

Just a thought, if you're contemplating who you'd want to play.

*************************************

Two games on Saturday MAY have huge implications for the Pens.





*******************************************



Note: Ottawa holds the tiebreaker over Philly and Boston,
because they have more wins, guaranteed.

Boston holds the head-to-head tiebreaker with Philadelphia.

IF PENS WIN SUNDAY:

-- Pens clinch #1 seed and will play the Flyers in the first round.
-- Philly getting a point in OT won't matter.

No questions asked. Simple as that.
If you want to play Philly in the first round, pull for the Pens on Sunday.

Okay?
Now, completely forget you read that.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Okay...

1) IF MONTREAL WINS AND THE FLYERS WIN:

-- Pens get #2 seed
-- Boston not getting a point means we play the Bruins.
-- Boston getting a point means we play the Senators.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

2A) IF PENS GET TOP SEED BUT LOSE TO THE FLYERS:

-- If Boston gets a point, we play the Senators.
-- If Boston doesn't get a point, we play Boston.

Whatev. Just wait till Sunday.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Some short and sweet news in Pens land.

We jobbed Shelly Anderson on Friday.
She responds with one of the top 10 columns in the history of newspapers.
[ Woooooooooo ]

:: The fate of Roberts playing Sunday lies with HCMT.

[Dave P]

"Through his career, he always has the reputation of elevating his game during the playoffs," Therrien said.

"But, for him, he hasn't played in more than three months. It's not easy for any athletes, even if they're young, to come back. So imagine a guy like that. So I want to see how he feels. He looks really good right now."

:: Malkin conceded the Art Ross to AO with, "I lose."

:: The Pens had Thursday off.
Hopefully, the last one they have for a while.

:: Gonchar is at the heart of the blue-line corps. [ PG ]

:: Therrien wants the Refs too be smart on Sunday. [ TRIB ]


[Mark K]

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Although not knowing it going into Friday night's games,
only one Southeast team will get in the playoffs.

If you don't take the division, fore.



The friggen Florida Panthers went in to Carolina Friday.
A Carolina win would have clinched their division.

In pure spoiler fashion, Florida beats Carolina in regulation 4-3.

Funny thing is...

With one second left in that game,
Carolina wanted to murder Florida.

One second AFTER the game,
Carolina became Florida's best friend.



Florida goes into Washington on Saturday.
If Washington even gets a point, they will win the Southeast.

If you're secretly pulling for Washington to get in the playoffs,
you're not alone.

If you don't want them in the playoffs,
you're not alone, either.

We hate Washington aas much as they hate us.
But as fans of the sport, you can't help but want to see them get in.

A Pittsburgh vs. Washington Eastern Conference Finals would change hockey forever.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::


[Paul S]

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::



We never go back and make out with ourselves when a prophecy comes into realization.
When we played Chicago last season, we said look out for them in '07-'08.

The Blackhawks will come up either 3 points or 1 point short of a playoff spot.
They would have gotten bounced by Detroit, anyway, but still.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::


[Mark K]

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

2000 PLAYOFFS

Sports Illustrated is sick.
We were looking for why that Game 2 in 2000 was changed to Pittsburgh.


And we found the complete recap of each game of that series with Washington. [SI.com]



The real reason for the game change?
A dance show. [PG Archives 2000]

"Clear the Floor: The "Burn the Floor" dance exhibition scheduled Tuesday and Wednesday at Mellon Arena was canceled. That show was one of the factors contributing to the unusual scheduling in this series, which will shift to Pittsburgh for Games 2 and 3."

If you went on to read that link.
How about this quote from Ron Wilson:

History never repeats: Coach Ron Wilson is a bit weary of hearing how the Capitals lost four of five playoff series to the Penguins in the 1990s, mostly because Lemieux can no longer hurt them on the ice. "It's got nothing to do with us," he said. "The biggest thorn in Washington's side is sitting in the owner's box. He doesn't play anymore. It's just a mindset. I guess writers have to find things to write about, and they just want to talk about the past. ... I don't like monkeys on my back, and I especially don't like other people's monkeys on my back."

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Sick website:

[Goalies Archives]

The fact that they have a picture of Darren Puppa is reason enough to go.

What a joke

[Thanks to Jschiff and Captain Dummy for the linkage]

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::



The Ottawa Senators in 1992 were 1-41 on the road [Wiki]

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Photoshops

Like we have been saying...

Photoshoppers are taking it to another level.
We wish we could post everyone that we get.

Here are some ones we have recently got
and some we have been sitting on because we are jokes.

As always if you sent one in, and we still haven't used it,
we either missed it, or we hate your face.


[Chase]



[Kris Pav]



[Rob S]



[Nicholas S]



[Ed S]

[Pat S]

[Cassie Chance]

[Dr. Trav]


[Kraftster]



[Thickandy]


[Scott A]

[Brian V]

[Ryan M]

[Bob G]

[Dylan H]

[Dan K]

[Kevin S]


[Mark K]

[Tommy]

[Dave P]


:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Go Pens

102 comments:

PittHockey said...

Here's what I'm hoping for:

Bruins in the first round.

Caps in the conference finals.

Epic.


I'll take anything though.

stokes said...

The quiet understatement that is the "29 Brick Wall" photoshop is brilliant.

Raybin said...

That Gary Roberts as Wolverine picture is enough to turn alcoholics sober. Forget AA, just read tPB.

Hal Gill as Jolly Green giant? Life affirming.

And thanks for putting up my Orpik as Candyman.

Ideally, I'd like to see us against the Senators in the first round. It would be so satisfying to cap their epic collapse with a sweep....plus there's all that unfinished business from last year.

Ottawa without Alfredsson is not the same team by a longshot.

But that would require a Pens loss and there's no way I'm rooting for that Sunday. My only worry is that a Flyers series would leave the Pens so battered that they'd be in serious trouble in round 2.

That being said, this team thrives at the Igloo and needs to play for the #1 spot, no matter what.

Carolina's collapse and Washington's surge? Me=stunned.

Fleury29 said...

Dave P, that brick wall PS is amazing and it is now my desktop background.

raybin, I agree. The more I think about it, the more I think Ottawa in the first round is the way to go. A little revenge from last year and a pretty certain, though probably still quite hard fought victory.

Stoosh said...

RAYBIN - Thanks for bringing back one of the most terrifying movies I've ever seen, too.

I saw Candyman in the theaters when I was in high school. To this day, it's the only horror movie that ever caused me to leave the theater because I thought I was going to be sick. The dead dog scene...yuck.

I will say, though, that if they ever do a movie about the 2007-08 Pens and Laraque needs to be cast, the next best choice behind Michael Clarke Duncan would have to be Tony Todd (the guy who played "Candyman").

Dr. Turkleton said...

-Tommy- PS of Ruutu 'Carrying The Team On His Back' = instant classic.

-dylan H- nice PS of Briere admiring the man-parts of The Jolly Green Gill

Go Panthers Go

Seeing the pain on the faces of fans in the stands in VAN 2 nights ago, with their team losing to EDM & eliminating themselves from playoff contention was painful.

Same way with Canes fans last night, even though they're not completely out of it yet.

That's why I'm hoping to see a FLA win tonight...and I hope the Center Ice feed is with the Capitals announce crew so they have lots of crowd shots to show the Agony of Defeat™ on their faces.

If the Caps win, then: meh. They really do deserve to get in, being the 4th hottest team since Jan. 1 with 57 points [Pens are 1st with 60]. If they could just leave their fans at home....

Flyer Hater said...

Count me among the people who don't want to see the Craps make the playoffs. If they do lose, I hope to God it's on a questionable call too. I would just love to see all the conspiracy theories that Craps' fans would make up.

"NHL doesn't want AO to steal Crosby's thunder"

"NHL knows that the Caps could beat the Pens down the road"

"Gary Bettman hates all Eastern Europeans except for Malkin because he PLAYS WITH CROSBY, DUH!!"

Personally, I would love to see Boston in the first round. They have a multitude of injuries including Savard, Kobasew, and Ference. Also, Chara can't play 50 minutes every game. It's easy to shut down one line, not so much when you have to shut down two. We would take Boston in no more than 5.

geezer said...

They are all good but I love the subtly of the 29 wall photo. It is unique. Bring on the Flyers Sunday and lets mow em down like weeds with a weed whacker! Lets see any predictions? Ah yes much whining by Philly fans followed by short term crying and long term pain of a playoffs loss. Lets kick some ass!

Sweetcheesus! said...

i am truly disappointed we were unable to eliminate the flyers. i wanted philly to drown in tears, as far as i am concerned they dont belong to this state. jersey can have them.

i digress, why is brooks orpik always portrayed as a serial killer of some sort. haha. it started with the van, then went to hannibal lecter, the other day on empty-netters he was described as looking "...as if he wants to stab the kid that gets his jersey.", and now the candyman. haha. It "SLAYS" me.

as far as the playoffs go they only team i feel really comfortable about is boston. unfortunately we havent played well against ottawa and philly is just going to try beat up on our guys with little regard.

photoshops were "hossome"

johnny said...

I'll be honest. I thought about the first round question for Mr. Madden's entire show yesterday and I still don't have an answer.

Guess I will kick back and watch the Montreal game tonight and see how it all works out.

Raybin said...

@stoosh

Glad I could dredge up pleasant memories! :-)

You're right....that movie is seriously messed up. Clive Barker is one weird dude.

@sweetcheesus

If I remember correctly, it's because someone said Orpik hands out hits like candy. And thus you had the creepy van of the guy cruising around offering candy. I could be wrong, though, so you may want to wait for independent verification.

Looked at that goalie site...hardcore stuff. If Sabourin stays with with the team, he needs to go back to his old helmet. Sick stuff!

Ashley said...

To be honest, I think I'd rather see Ottawa in the first round. Sure, I think that the Pens could beat the Flyers, but those cowardly goons will do nothing but try to seriously injure the Pens. After all, that's what cowards do when they can't win fairly. I know that there are typically a lot of cheap shots in the playoffs, but judging by how Philly has 'played' their game this season, I think they'll take it over and above anything we've seen. I'd rather see Washington play Philly and have Ovechkin score goal after goal. That would be awesome, because even though I'm not a big Capitals fan, I'd cheer for Ovechkin and company to beat the snot out of Philly.

On another note, I have been posting on TSN.ca for a year and a half now, but today was the first time that anyone has responded to me - and all it took was an anti-Cryers comment or two to do it.

The Seeker said...

@ Sweetcheesus!


Just take a glance at Orpik's official team photo...he looks like a serial killer/child molester with those eyes.

War Penguin said...

Sweetcheesus - last season 90% of the time when the camera was on Orpik at games, he had this thousand yard stare look on his face. You don't see it as much this year, but I think that's why all the Photoshops of Orpik make him seem creepy.

I was hoping that we and the Caps would combine to knock out the Flyers, and then it would be a 1/8 matchup of the Pens and the Caps - but whatever. I can admit I'm a little worried about the Flyers gooning it up (as usual, but more so) against the Pens in the playoffs.

Dr. Turkleton said...

Don't know if anyone else caught this on KDKA-TV yesterday....

Crosby gets welcomed as Pittsburghs newest honorary firefighter

coffeytalk said...

I rarely call Orpik by his real name. I've always referred to him as "Crazy Eyes". Watch him in an interview, they dance around as if looking for prey.

j.s.22 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Stoosh said...

ASHLEY - With all of Boston's injuries right now, that's who I'd prefer to see in the playoffs, I think. Marco Strum has killed us this year, though. Overall, I just don't think they have the depth the check both top lines and then two solid lower lines capable of generating some offense.

Ottawa is a very, very close second. They're backing into the playoffs at about 200 miles an hour right now. Their goaltending is a mess. Wade Redden is an even bigger mess. Their coach is a mess. Their fanbase - for the most part - is a mess because the old window might be closing. The injuries to Alfie and Fisher could really hurt as well, because that leaves Heatley, Spezza and Vermette to pick up the offense. Heatley still scares me, and Spezza's skills still override his inability to inspire teammates in the locker room, but there's something missing with that team. There's no sense of team...not like what they had last year. Ottawa's top-line talent worries me. That's it.

A Philly series would be fun. I think we'd be fine there. At some point, that series would deteriorate into exactly what this last game did...the Flyers running around taking stupid penalties. The Pens know that they can goad the Flyers into stuff like this (witness Orpik skating away from Hartnell the other night). And at that point, the power play takes over. I think the Flyers are more susceptible to the head games than are the Pens (this is where guys like Roberts and Orpik will help), and I think Biron is a soft, emotionally-fragile goaltender.

Either way, I think we're fine.

j.s.22 said...

Now it was only during practice, but how about these lines:

Malone Malkin Sykora
Talbot Crosby Hossa
Dupuis Staal Ruutu
Roberts Hall Laraque

Eric K said...

@ mark K

nice job on the THIS IS THE PENSBLOG photoshop.

I'm pulling for the Flyers in the first round...the rivalry has really picked up steam over the past two seasons and this would just be an insane series. Hopefully, things won't get out of hand.

GO Pens

pengylady said...

Orpik looking for prey: I was once told they called him "The Manbeast" during his college playing days. . . does that fit or what!

coffeytalk said...

unrelatedblog:

for stoosh, long awaited 80s Prom:

Dancin' with Ourselves

Flyer Hater said...

For once, whoever we play in the first round, we'll have a decided goaltending edge.

Fleury>Thomas

Fleury>Gerber or Emery

Fleury>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Biron or Nittymaki

P.S.

Is anyone else watching every single NHL playoff youtube clip to get pumped?

/patheticblog

Ashley said...

Stoosh - I don't disagree that we have the advantage over Boston/Ottawa/Philly going into round one, and we could probably beat the hell out of Philly, but I'd rather not have our guys face the cowards of the Flyers. Sure, they'll fall behind and then resort to taking penalty after penalty after stupid penalty, but I don't want to see our guys getting their brains scrambled because the Flyers are sore losers.

Besides, a little revenge over the Senators would be nice...they certainly are one giant mess waiting to be sent to the golf course in mid-April. I wouldn't mind seeing Heatley and Spezza here in Halifax in May for the WC...

Flyer Hater said...

You know, if Backstrom doesn't put the puck in his own net against us back on March 9th, the Caps already have the SE division clinched.

Stoosh said...

COFFEYTALK - Awwwww, you remembered! :)

That must have been a blast! Outstanding job on the outfits, too! Please tell me someone there managed to peg their jeans or something.

That reminds me of all the goofy dances we used to have in the late 1980s when I was in 7th/8th grade, right down to the bottle of Absolut Vodka...er,...um...I mean...um, nevermind.

(Absolut = mmmmmmm, good!)

The Big K said...

To win it all, you gota beat em all.
And we will.

Bring it on.

Michelle said...

I really love the Ruutu photoshop! It's really awesome.

Why do you think the Pens have had trouble matching up against the Bruins this season? They haven't had the best success against them.

For some reason I just don't think it matters who the Pens face in the first round. They have the advantage in all categories, they just need to bring it. :)

Go Pens!

PensfanSeoul said...

Back from Korea, and eagerly anticipating the Playoffs this year. Last year, there was almost a sense of relief that we made it, this season, there is a sense of urgency. The way that the ENTIRE team is hitting right now impresses the hell out of me.

Honestly, I dont care who we play in the first round. I dont think it will make much difference.

To the photoshoppers....*stands and starts slow clap*
I am amazed at your talent and creativity. Nothing is better than coming on here and seeing a new batch of incredible ps's to get me ready for tomorrows game.

Also, I know its a few days late, but the defense of c-blog was amazing. The Rangers and Filthydelphia fans got it handed to them much like their respective teams.

novelblog

Stoosh said...

ASHLEY -

Yeah, the Philly stuff bothers me because what they do from time to time has no place in hockey. The reason I'd like to avoid them in the playoffs has nothing to do with the chance that they'd pull an upset; they aren't disciplined enough and Biron is good enough to win four of seven games against the Pens when the intensity is ratcheted up. What worries me about the Flyers is that they're the team most likely to go Adam Graves on us and take a two-handed whack to Crosby's wrist, or perhaps take a head shot at one of the other players.

Ottawa has been a very average team since Thanksgiving, and they've been in a relative freefall for the better part of the second half of the year. It's a team that looks like it knows changes are coming...like maybe some players need a change of scenery (Redden, Emery, etc). Losing Alfredsson was bad; compounding that with Fisher was worse because Fisher's always struck me as one of those "heart and soul" guys that helped define that team. I guess we'll know for sure in about 24 hours.

There are two teams that make me nervous - Montreal and the Rangers. Beyond that, I think we're in good shape.

Any word on the Canadian roster for the WCs yet? I wasn't sure if Halifax may be getting a visit from Mr. Armstrong.

Sweetcheesus! said...

Greatfulblog . . .

Thank you all for filling me in on the secret about my boy brooksy. i just thought it was because he has been a maniac on the penalty "KILL." I guess that works to but everybody is definately right about the eyes. its like staring into an icy abyss of torment.

viva la roberts!

Ashley said...

Stoosh - I'll be covering the WC in full force for Faceoff Factor, and will likely start after round 1 of the playoffs. Since there are 16 teams (as opposed to the 10 teams in the WJC), I think I'll focus more on Canada and USA and just give brief updates on the other teams.

All I know about Team Canada so far is that Ken Hitchcock is coaching. They won't make roster announcements until next week. Nash wants to play, and after his MVP performance last year, I'd be shocked if Yzerman didn't give him a call. Lecavalier is out because he needs shoulder surgery - though we've known that he wouldn't play for weeks b/c he's had a bum wrist all season.

I hope Army makes the trip to H'fax. Even though he only scored one goal at last year's WC, it was the game winner in the gold medal game.

Less than a month to go...

Jonny V said...

In the first round I hope we play whoever we play. It's all good...baby, bay bay.

j.s. it's strange that you have Crosby centering the second line. Even stranger that you can't really argue against it this season. I think we have a helluva team.

coffeyconverse, looks like u had a good time. Cherish that stuff, cause like a majority of us will tell u, time friggin' flies after high school. Sometimes I feel like Billy Madison when he grabbed that chubby kid by the cheeks and said "don't say that, don't you ever say that...stay as long as you can...for the love of Gary...cherish it...you gotta cherish it...you do..."

Outstanding photoshops people, i hate you for having that much artistic talent and imagination not to mention actually knowing how to use those friggin' programs. But it's a good hate. A healthy hate.

Ashley said...

Vancouver's last game of the season tonight, and everyone expects it to be Trevor Linden's last game.

"He will play. He will play on crutches."

He will be missed.

Flyer Hater said...

Go Leafs!

Go Sabres!

MizzPenz said...

I don't know about out there in da 'burgh, but here in central pa (harrisburg) I saw alot of Flyer stuff on loser's bodies today. Just like always.. here they come out of the woodwork. God I hate living out here sometimes.

coffeytalk said...

jonny v,

oh believe me I cherish it all. I'm 24 years old now and highschool seems like it was 20 years ago already.

Dr. Turkleton said...

@coffeytalk

probably no 'tini drinkin' there...maybe some bartles & jaymes or seagrams wine coolers [whine coolers if any DC or philly fans were present] !!!

Ashley said...

Montreal goal...1-0

wilsmith said...

Fact. ^^

Also 24, and I coach a high school hockey team and it kills me every I have to check their birth certificates and I realize a kid born in 1990 is a senior in high school.

I hope that in all of those pictures, the girls were chewing unnecessarily large wads of bubblegum. Otherwise, it's not quite 80's enough.

Alright, peace out, I'm gonna go watch the Molly Ringwald marathon that's on tv tonight.

Oh, and soon as the playoff schedule is announced, we begin planning a potential tailgate.

wilsmith said...

My "Fact ^^" is pointing to coffeytalks post. derrr.

people reply so fast these days!

but it is 1-0 Montreal, that's a fact too.

Ashley said...

damn...2-0 Montreal...

Ashley said...

oooo not over...mark bell scores for toronto...score some more leafers

Flyer Hater said...

Well the Habs are going to win because Andrew Raycroft wouldn't be a starter for the Monroeville Beer League Dek league.

The Bruins also look like they'll lose to the Sabres in regulation.

In all honesty, getting the number 1 seed doesn't mean too much. I'm hoping for a loss to the Flyers tomorrow and an easy series with the Bruins.

Ashley said...

flyer hater - true, getting the first seed in the conference means fuck all, but it still would be nice. and i wouldn't count out the leafs right now because raycroft is playing pretty well.

al gore at the bell centre with david suzuki...planning an environmental take over in montreal?

Doc Steel said...

If tonight's scores stay the same:

Pens win, #1 seed, we play PHI
Pens lose, #2 seed, we play OTT

It's that simple, kid.

Lloyd said...

everyone going to be in gamedaychat.com tomorrow?

Ashley said...

Pittsburgh, Montreal and Washington all division champs...what a list of teams.

this is gonna be one crazy playoff season.

Lloyd said...

wow... don't search for gary roberts in a google search with safe search off...

Ashley said...

Montreal > Toronto

It was hilarious to see McCabe literally running off the ice and down the runway after getting in a fight with the Habs' rookie Gregory Stewart with 1 second left in the game. Have fun golfing, McCabe...

Tomorrow's game should be good.

wilsmith said...

Yeah Lloyd, no kidding. Learned that lesson! Apparently he draws porn in his spare time.

I just caught the end of the Caps v Panthers game, and honestly I'm glad they made the playoffs. The Capital are a good team.

Seriously, nothing but good can come from having OV in the playoffs. We hate him because he plays for the Caps, but we're not a bunch of idiots who thinks he sucks and doesn't deserve the chance to be a star. He's a beast and if it gets people to pay attention to hockey, then I hope they make it the whole way to the Eastern Conference Finals.

Now, as for the Pens. I really hope they turn it up a notch in the playoffs. I remember every goal against Fleury and every run that some Senator took at one of our D-men last season. Every one. Like it was all last night. I really hope that the Pens are on the delivering side of all those things. I know it's not really their game, but I want the Pens to decide to just be a bunch of assholes, punish every opposing player who touches the puck, back check like they'll be cut if they get a minus, and forecheck like they get a bonus for every body check. This is the best time of the year, and my production at work is going to drop significantly because of it.

I've been watching all those videos, just like everyone else, and I'm always thinking "man, it would have been awesome to be a Ducks fan last year" (or a Sens fan, at least to the Finals, and as long as you like gettin' cornholed),and if I get the chills watching another team be awesome, I can't imagine what it's gonna be like if the Pens can put it all together this spring.

As for hoping for matchups? I'm not doing it. I'll say a team I hope we play for whatever reason, and they'll come in and run the show.

ps. Shaved today, with a razor, for the first time in FOUR YEARS in preparation for growing the playoff beard. Who's with me? Who's making the photo album?

KJ said...

all i know is no matter who we meet, i'll be nerve wrecked. i love the playoffs, but hate getting that feeling in the stomach waiting for each game popping xanax like advil.

Vinnie said...

I'm probably going to fail my last term of grad school from watching and hosting too many Pens games.

Oh well. I can repeat grad school, can't repeat pens playoff games.

The Seeker said...

Lloyd said...

"wow... don't search for gary roberts in a google search with safe search off..."


Hahahahaha!!!

I searched Google IMAGES for "Gary Roberts" with safe-search off just once.

Ummmmm...I won't mention the hits it showed - here in mixed company!!

Jaybird said...

Why do you guys think Gary Roberts is even half decent anymore? He was washed up on the leafs. Montreal will dominate the East Pitt has no D; and "MAF" will blow it no doubt. Fleury choked for our Canadiens at the world juniors and I'll never forgive him for his blunder. Roberts was awesome; 15 years ago.

Jonny V said...

wilsmith, i'm def. down with the playoff beard album. I have drill tomorrow, and then not again for five weeks. Hopefully i'll have to shave it for that and not a playoff series loss.

kj, u gotta love that feeling. The anticipation all day of game time. Walking with an extra bounce in your step. The day feels like a holiday. Being so nervous that you can hardly eat all day, about up until the puck drops. Then pure bliss sets in as you realize you're watching your favorite team playing in the greatest post-season tournament on Earth.





Groovy.

Ally said...

What hell hath jaybird wrought?

The fury of Gary will rain from the heavens tonight!

demondg1 said...

Call me crazy and biased, but the first Incredible Malk PS was the best.

Dr. Turkleton said...

r*g*b > jaybird ????



Oh Lay, Oh LayOh LayOh Lay

The Habs suck! The Habs suck!

Say 'hi' to Saku for me [en francais]

Carie Price & Les Canadiens will fold quicker than a Quebec Secession meeting at Don Cherry's house.

[Hossa]

Jonny V said...

And it looks like the first playoff stone has been cast. Talk as you will about Mr. Roberts at your own risk.

That is a pretty wicked video with Kovy on your blog, though. He's a beast.

The Big K said...

Roberts with Hossa and Sid would be wise move.
Roberts serves as protection against "big, bad" Riley Cote and Puss Downie. If one of those two fag rags takes a run at Sid or Hossa, GR will filet them, cut them up, scalp them, gut them again, behead them, and throw them in a fire.

And Ottawa or Philly. Who cares?

Philly Sucks.
Alfie is out for Ottawa. AKA heart and soul of team.

Stoosh said...

ASHLEY - Linden's last game ever in Vancouver. :(

Hockey loses another good one.

Heart and soul of the Canucks for almost 20 years, and one of my absolute favorites from my Canuck-loving days. I still remember that Sports Illustrated cover of him during the 1994 Cup Finals when he was battling some Ranger for a puck and had this absolutely possessed look on his face.

I watch Jordan Staal play and I see a lot of Trevor Linden, so if that's the direction Staal's career goes in terms of production, I'll be a happy camper.

I guess Vancouver needs to get to work on putting #16 up in the rafters.

Flyer Hater said...

It really shouldn't matter who we play in the first round, there's no reason that either series should go more than 6 games.

Let's look at the Cryers. They have some decent depth up front and are definitely strong up the middle. However, their defense is awful and will have one hell of a time not getting pinned in their own zone against us. Just think of us as Ottawa last year and Jason Smith and Modry as Rob Scuderi and Josef Melichar last year. Their goaltending is downright awful. Marty Biron has never won a playoff game and has sucked against us this year and I don't even need to talk about Antero "6 point night for Sid" Nittymaki.

Even with the injuries the Sens still do have some dangerous scoring punch with Healtey and Spezza and are still relatively strong on the backend. However, they have shown no fire, heart, consistency, etc. since December. They basically have only one line that even scares you. Emery and Gerber maybe one of the worst 1/2 punches in goal of any team in the playoffs this year.

Bring on anyone.

Dr. Turkleton said...

@johnny v

i'm surprised they even have electricity in kanata [besides the ufo in the middle of nowhere called: The Corel Centre or is it called Scotiabank Place or maybe it's called Living Hell, North of the Border Arena {LH-NotB Arena, for short}]

Wow, a Hab fan in Sens territory...

That's like noticing Tomas Plekanec without a turtle neck on to hide the Kostitsyn Sisters' sucker bites. or
Seeing Ryan O'Bourne with a stolen womens purse [oh wait, that DID happen!]
Finding Kovy teaching a motorcycle safety class. or
Jacques Demers reading a newspaper [or ANYTHING, for that matter]

We don't even play these Canadi-clowns in round 1 & one slithers over to talk shit?
Looking at his blog site with ZERO comments...guess we're his 'freinds'.

Sans Koivu
Sans Komisarek
Sans Ryder
Sans Kovalev [Playoff Amber Alert]

They will be gone after round 1

[Ass oh]

racheleyos said...

so I was thinking "what could be so wrong about googling gary roberts without safesearch on"

oh shit lol. little did I kno gary roberts was correlated with japanese anime porn! wtf!

wwgrd?????

Flyer Hater said...

the big k, I like your youtube videos little guy but you're way off in your analysis of the first line. Gary Roberts would slow down Crosby and Hossa more than a Ben Affleck movie slows down sales at the local box office.

Scary Gary is just too slow to be on a first line anymore

*prepares for lightning bolt*

Jaybird said...

Full respect here; this site is pretty hilarious...

Carey Price is the real deal...Won a Junior Championship and the Calder Cup in the same year. Going for another Calder this year! The gap in your logic is bigger than Fleury's front teeth or the gap in Pronger's teeth! I know Montreal will be facing Pittsburgh and wanted to stir some shit up. Hello to Saku in french in "bonjour" or "salut" i don't know what it is in Finnish. If you come back from serious cancer and captain a hockey team people would probably cheer for you also; but since you neither play hockey or captain even a dinghy people don't...KOVALEV RULES!

BTW i hate the OLE song song and find it embarrassing...GO HABS GO

Jaybird said...

Anyways I declare myself defeated on this blog....too many quick witted readers and not enough time to write comebacks...BUT

-Mario Lemieux wore a turtleneck
-we call the KosTITSyn brothers Big Tits and little Tits
-Lapierre stole the purse and turtled, O'Byrne took the heat
-Kanata sucks but home is where home is
-Sens fans should be called "minivan fans..."

Dr. Turkleton said...

@racheleyos


ギャリー何をロバーツはするか。

translation: WWGRD?

@jaybird

just wanted to make you feel 'at home'....

your team has overcome lots of adversity this year & I'm sure you are as shocked as the prognosticators that picked them to finish in the teens in the conference that their on the verge of finishing king of the mountain.

Maybe we'll meet up with your squad in a month+ in the conf. finals.

Stoosh said...

JAYBIRD -

You can't blame Fleury for that play any more than you can blame Coburn.

Not to drudge up bad memories here for our Canadian C-bloggers (sorry, guys), but...

If that play
happens 100 times, the same result occurs maybe once or twice. It's called a bad bounce.

Fleury had to move that puck. He had O'Sullivan bearing down on him because a Canadian defenseman turned the puck over at the blueline. He couldn't go back to his left because O'Sullivan was there. Fleury couldn't come out to cover it without risking a Malarchuk-type injury since O'Sullivan's momentum would've probably forced him to try to hurdle Fleury.

How about blaming the Canadian player who turned the puck over at the blue line in the first place? Or maybe just admit that Al Montoya stood on his head and kept the US in it?

There was plenty of "blame" to go around for Canada losing that game, but the truth is that they ran into a goaltender who was playing out of his absolute mind, and Montoya got the better of them. Unfortunately Fleury has borne most of the blame for what was simply a bad bounce at the wrong time.

Jaybird said...

Ugggh...can't believe you found that video I was looking for it. I have to drink more now! Anyways good luck in the playoffs boys!

Dr. Turkleton said...

anyone else catching Christopher Walken on SNL???

I'm waiting for:

We Need More Cow Bell!!!!!! [is anyone even left from that original skit?]

or

The Continential

Stoosh said...

JAYBIRD -

For the record, Carey Price scares the hell out of me. As does the Habs power play. As does Kovalev.

But a Pens-Habs series would be some damn entertaining hockey.

Stoosh said...

DR. TURK -

Have some sham-PAN-ya.

Jaybird said...

Your right about the blame though but goalies shouldn'yt be shooting up the middle...ever. Unless going for an empty net goal up 3-1....honestly this site is the tits and I'll continue reading! I wish I had photoshop skills...or nunchaku skills....or loyal senders!

Ill be back if the Pens and Habs square off...what would Mike Komisarek do?

Dr. Turkleton said...

this cactus skit is cracking me up...

googlie eyes !!!!!

Ashley said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Stoosh said...

ASHLEY & FLYER HATER - Just a comment on the discussion over the value of the first seed versus the value of the second seed.

Two main reasons I want the first seed:

1. I want this team to raise a banner next year at the home opener, and this would be a nice banner to raise. Hopefully, it's raised with that OTHER banner that we all want, but you get my point.

2. I'd much rather play four of seven games against the Habs at home instead of four of seven in Montreal. The fewer trips to Montreal - where the fans practically seem to try to intimidate the refs - the better.

Stoosh said...

JAYBIRD - Just my opinion, but I always thought Fleury was trying to get the puck to the RW boards on that play and unfortunately just didn't adjust his angle enough because he had to come out to his left a little. I never got the impression he went up the middle with it.

Ashley said...

Stoosh - Linden retiring is definitely a sad thing. He was named the first star of the game tonight, though (a game where the 'Nucks lost 7-1 and Iginla got his 50th).

When he left the ice after taking a final skate around the rink at the end of the game, the announcers said that he'll be back - when they raise his number to the rafters of GM Place (next season?).

I have a feeling that the Canucks will look VERY different come September. I expect Naslund to be gone too, and there are rumours that Luongo may be on his way out (not sure how much stock to put in that), and they have to resign the Sedins.

Jaybird - As for the Habs, I think that they are the real deal. Carey Price is the real deal, and the team is doing just fine with their injuries - just like Pittsburgh this year. Kovalev has changed from the prima donna he was last year and is a force on the ice.

I also think that the Pens are the real deal. I don't ever think of MAF as a choker in the playoffs. When he played in the WJC, he was named MVP even though he let up that one goal in the gold medal game - he was a scapegoat. I also think that MAF was one of our better players in last year's playoffs.

I'm hoping for a Pittsburgh-Montreal series for the conference finals. Absolutely sick.

Dr. Turkleton said...

@stoosh

Price does seem cool as a cucumber / does he even have a pulse?

I see Caputi had a nice night v. Oshawa 1+1 and a +3....after being down 3-0, they come back & score 5 to win 5-3 to tie the series at 1 apiece

Flyer Hater said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Flyer Hater said...

Lightning just can't strike three times for the same franchise or can it?

1. Dryden

2. Roy

3. Price?

Unreal.

Dr. Turkleton said...

@ashley

the canucks out of the playoffs might have come down to Roberto skipping the game after the AS game, in DAL [resulting in a L] to be with his wife [wasn't the 3 days off for the AS game time enough?]
I understand the whole 'being there for the birth of your 1st baby' thing is important, but she just gave birth a couple weeks ago, right?
Couldn't he just have taken the AS 3-day vacation off to be in FLA with his wife, go play in DAL, then go back to FLA [where VAN was headed anyways?]
I'm sure VAN fans are still scratchin' their heads over that ordeal...

racheleyos said...

lol.. thanks dr. turkleton :)

Flyer Hater said...

Nobody on c-blog is saying this but I'm reading it on other Penguins oriented message boards. It seems like people are afraid to face the Flyers. I just don't get it. We're more physical than them, we're tougher than them, we have more talent than them. They're not the broad street bullies anymore. Bobby Clarke isn't playing in Game 1. The Legion of Doom line has been disbanded. Pelle Lindbergh has died. We shouldn't fear the Flyers, the Flyers should fear us.

Jaybird said...

Fuck okay had to come back, cab not here yet....Fleury went to the right. Montreal Pittsburgh will be a classic. Lightning can strike three times ask this guy...

"One LSESSI member has been victimized both indoors and outdoors. The record holder, however, is Roy C. Sullivan, an ex-park ranger who survived seven different lightning strikes. According to the Guinness Book of Records, Sullivan was first hit by lightning in 1942, which caused him to lose his big toenail. Over the next 35 years, lightning burned off Sullivan's eyebrows, seared his left shoulders, set his hair on fire, struck his legs, injured his ankle, and burned his stomach and chest."

Effin' hilarious what a douche...sorry to clog your blog

Jonny V said...

docturk, "I can't figure out how to put google eyes on grass...it just falls into the dirt..."
That Walken convention was awesome.

Big K, I think maybe you were just talking about Roberts on Sid's line for the Flyers game. Which I can see your point, but I don't see him logging major minutes in his first game back. He's a third or fourth liner at best, plus he's coming back from a major injury at an advanced age.

His presence will be felt though. Figuratively and literally.

Jonny V said...

And jaybird, I can't help but think of that scene in the Akroyd-Candy classic The Great Outdoors with the guy who got struck sixty-six times. I love that movie.

Stoosh said...

FLYER HATER & JAYBIRD -

Continuing discussion on lightning striking a franchise several times, consider...

1. Dryden
2. Roy
3. Price?

1. Mario
2. Jagr
3. Crosby?

And it even extends to franchise douchebaggery...

1. Hextall
2. Lindros
3. Downie?

Ashley said...

Dr Turk - I don't think you can hang the whole season on that one game against Dallas. I don't really blame Luongo for missing that one game because his wife lived in FLA and was having complications with her pregnancy, so he wanted to spend a week with her.

What I will say, though, is that the Canucks needed him to be better than he was this season. He's an outstanding goalie, but he had too many average games. Vancouver went through some serious injury problems - I think at one point their entire D corps consisted of 1 veteran (a 3 year player) and a bunch of AHL players) - and their offense just couldn't find the net all season.

In all, this season showed that the Canucks have some big-time problems and Dave Nonis will have his hands full this summer.

Stoosh said...

ASHLEY - Vancouver is kind of like the Ottawa Senators - West. There's something going on there that doesn't seem quite right, and it's going to be a team in transition.

The window has probably shut on the likes of Naslund and Morrison. Linden has retired. And Luongo is getting burned out by an offense that doesn't give him enough support. They're very defense-heavy on their roster - Salo, Ohlund, Mitchell, Bieksa, Krajicek, Edler and Bourdon are all signed through next year.

The Sedins will almost certainly be extended this summer, but if Naslund and Morrison both go, that leaves them with the Sedins, Ryan Kesler and Taylor Pyatt and not much else...not much that inspires offensive fear in the hearts of opposing players.

If I were the Canucks, I'd give some serious consideration to dealing Luongo for a couple of young, can't-miss forward prospects. They should also probably look into dealing a defenseman as well.

Dr. Turkleton said...

@johnny v

if roberts even plays tomorrow & doesn't suffer any setbacks, I'll be pleasantly surprised. Just like you said: 3rd or 4th liner & occasional wing on a top 2 line for a shift for the 'fear factor'.

@flyerhater

bring on the flyers. let's shoot for 8 straight W's v. those Mistakes by the -Steaks: 4 to end the season series, 4 to sweep the playoff series.

than would mean:
MTL v BOS: habs v. former habs coaches' 'trap'
WSH v OTT: talk about teams going in the opposite directions!
NJD v NYR:final game tomorrow, but to determine home ice

@stoosh

you probably could've put 5 different names into flyer position #3 & they all would've fit nicely.

@ashley

I don't mean to sound like a cold-hearted dirtball...because I don't know all the issues surrounding Luongo's absence from the team for that amount of time...but maybe those events led to a shift in team 'unity' or a feeling that he 'let the team down' in some sort of way...I wonder what their record was after the AS break...
It just could be simply, like you said, he just played poorly in crucial games [maybe his head was 2806 mi {4515 km} away]

dani said...

Last year, somewhere, I heard that no team has won the President's trophy and the Stanley Cup in the same year. Although it could have been, "not since (fill in the blank) year." I don't know.

flyer hater: Go Sabres!

...what have I done?

Ashley said...

Stoosh - I don't know about dealing Luongo, unless Luongo expressed to Nonis that he wants to be dealt. One of the biggest mistakes the Isles and Panthers made was dealing Luongo.

In any case, there was some talk tonight on HNIC that he wants to move back east (Ottawa perhaps?) and that Spezza may be out of Ottawa....maybe a swap? I seriously don't put much into these rumours..at least not yet.

I'm with you, though - Vancouver needs scoring. You can't win a game if you don't score a goal. Maybe they could trade a D-man or two for some scoring fowards, and dip into the free agency pool. If they can persuade Olli Jokinen to make the move, Luongo will a much, much happier goalie.

Ashley said...

Dr. Turk - Who knows what really happened to Vancouver's mentality that led them to this point, although I somehow doubt that Luongo's missed game created this entire mess. At least I hope it didn't, because as far as I can see, Luongo was allowed to miss that one game for that reason. I guess you could also say that he made it up to his team when he didn't miss a single game when his daughter was born - he flew to FLA and was in Minnesota for the game 2 days later (although I believe it was a loss).

Stoosh said...

ASHLEY -

Yep, I should've qualified that "deal Luongo" suggestion.

The ONLY way Luongo should be dealt is if there is big-time help coming back to Vancouver up front. I do agree that all things being equal, he's too valuable. Florida and the Islanders didn't get enough back for him when they dealt him. The best player Florida got from Vancouver was Bryan Allen; the Isles dealt Luongo and Jokinen to Florida for Mark Parrish and Oleg Kvasha (that's almost too ridiculous to type).

For some dumb reason, I completely overlooked the free agency option. I suppose with some of the money Vancouver may save by not re-signing Naslund and Morrison, they could add a couple of players via free agency to get the Sedins some help.

KJ said...

an informal way to say hello in finnish is terve

the last team to win the Pres & Cup was the 01-02 Wings, the Avs did it the year before. The Stars, Rangers, Calgary & Edmonton have also done it

@ johnny, i usually don't have much of a bounce in my step on playoff days simply cause you'll find me in a corner rocking back & forth. but it is a good feeling too, in one of those ways you cannot describe to people who just don't get it

KJ said...

@ vinnie, they really should have a break for playoffs in school. i remember i stayed up for all of philly vs pens game 4 in 2000. i got maybe an hour of sleep before i had to get up and get ready for my 7:30am final. i'll never forget driving to school they mentioned it on the radio (big deal since i'm not in pitts) and my friend looked over and said "you stayed up for all of it didn't you?!". duh!!!

i was lucky enough to pass that test, so good luck to you

Ashley said...

Stoosh - something else that makes me a little iffy about dealing Luongo is this question: who would take over the number 1 job? I wouldn't want to saddle Sanford with those duties, and I'm not sure who's all in the Vancouver system.

I'd have to laugh, though, if Nonis made some sort of deal with Murray that sent Luongo to Ottawa for Spezza, Emery and Gerber.

That's one way for Murray to solve his goaltending problems.

Ashley said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Stoosh said...

ASHLEY - Hey, in terms of goaltending UFA's, they could always get Conklin. :)

Actually, the biggest UFA name out there right now is probably Huet, and I'd have to guess Washington might try to sign him. Everyone else looks to be among the washed-up or question-mark types.

Lots of RFA's though...Fleury, Leclaire, Lehtonen (who I've heard is falling out of favor in Atlanta), Jimmy Howard, Jonas Hiller. Pickings are a little slim and there's no one out there that screams "immediate solution" that wouldn't involve several first-round picks being forfeited on Vancouver's part.

So chances are Luongo isn't going anywhere. Maybe with Luongo in place and a cost-effective defense also locked up, Vancouver has no other choice but to turn to the free agent market. Hossa, maybe? Yikes.

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