Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Trick or Treat. PENS WIN.

[pit.<span class=[min.<span class=


These types of games are a big deal.
On the road. Tough place to play. Solid team.

Bottom line -- Evgeni Malkin and Sidney Crosby are slowly starting to take over the world.
And we are just along for the ride.

Everything always seems like it is working when you win.
Good times.

...................................................................

The big thing early on was seeing Roberts jersey flying as he entered the zone.
He's back.

Sabourin was challenged early with a routine slapper from Rolston.
Rolston's a beast.

Recchi was still with Hall and Kennedy. Solid line.
Rex was a third-liner when Carolina won the Cup a couple years ago.

Minnesota uniforms look pretty sharp.

But Tonya Harding's pads make you want to stab something, like your eyes.


WWWHHWHWHWHWWHWWHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Later, the puck bounced around and found Koivu's stick in the slot.
Another big save early for Sabu.

Staal-Christensen-Sykora come out. That line sounds good.
Nothing happens. Christensen doesn't know what's going on.
Perhaps we are all seeing what Lord Therrien has been thinking.

Versus tells us that the players' moms joined them for some games.
There's a job there somewhere.


Halfway through the period, no one even knows this is a hockey game.
Defensive-system blog.
The Pens seem content to play a patient game.
Jacques Lemaire loves when his players touch other men as much as possible.

My Two Dads got some face time.
Roberts looks like he just killed something.

The action started to open up a bit later in the period.
Malkin looked like he was gonna get a chance, but no way.

The Wild come back and Koivu again is robbed right in front.



Recchi had a nice steal on a backcheck.

What is it with Pens games on Versus being more boring than a chicken's sac.
10 shots in the first period. Total. Both teams.

The only thing noteworthy from the first period was Malkin may have a mullet in the works.

........................................................................

SECOND

The Pens were buzzing big-time to start the second period.
Gonchar rang one off the pipe. Sounded solid. Most exciting thing that happened so far in the game.

And finally, something happens.
Ryan Malone works hard to get the puck to Bing.
Crosby gets hooked going behind the net, loses the puck.
Malkin grabs it and knows what he's gotta do.


The Minnesota Miracle man Gordan Bombay = Stunned
1-0.

Before you know it, EC listlessly gives the puck away.
Radiovowhatev unleashes a tank of a slapshot.
It hits the pipe, bounces right to some French guy.
1-1.

It was time to start hating Minnesota fans.
But hold the phone.

Ryan Malone was surreal tonight.
He gets a shot off. It looks like it's a rebound to Malkin.
Actually, upon further review, Sid kicked it over to Malkin. Sick.

Holy balls. That's another goal. 2-1.



The best part was Minnesota announcing their goal right after Malkin scored.
What a kick in the anus.
Almost as bad as losing a hockey franchise.
Oops.
Let's move on.

Just like the North Stars.
Oops.

We were finally seeing hockey. It was good.
Both goalies are playing well.
Joe Hardy makes a few big saves.


Sadly no one has recovered from this picture.
So gay.

What a dumb play by the Wild D-man after Malkin douched him with the elbow.
We lose Malkin, but we get some 4-on-4.

On the 4-on-4, Koivu gets robbed again after trying to job one off the boards.
Sabu's been eating his lunch for him all game.

Later, Hall goes to the box.
We lose the faceoff man and a PKer.

The Pens got out of the PK with only a couple scares.

That was it.
We get a nice story about Minnesota's goalie's helment.
He is all jammed up about that bridge thing. It happened in August. Whatev.

.....................................................................

THIRD

Early in the third, Sabu gets some love from the Versus announcers.

No one knows who the color guy is or where he came from.
Weirdest accent in broadcasting history. (Jschiff)

Tick-tock, third period.
Adam Hall gets jobbed off a faceoff, and it was go time with some pretty boy.
After that, the Wild were pumped.

Minnesota was pushing harder and harder.
It looked like it was just a matter of time, and then it happened.
Rolston was solid all game.
2-2.

The Pens get busy livin' after the goal.

Talbot gets stuff going and draws a penalty.
Biggest PP of the season was upcoming.

What happened next is what life is all about.
Sykora curls into a seam.
Crosby and Gonch set it up.
If you enjoy hockey, you enjoy Petr Sykora's release.
Just digusting.
Scoring this exact goal is why Shero signed him.
Shero should be on Heroes.
3-2.

Later, Roberts carries it into the zone and Recchi's it.
Sorely in need of a wristband.

The Pens kept buzzing after that.
Recchi sets up Gonchar all alone in the slot. Big save by Joe Hardy.


Is there a reason he is trying to look like John Madden

Malkin and Crosby already started doing their dance with 8:00 left.

And there it was.
In a play reminiscent of that OT goal against the Flyers in his rookie season, he gets a breakaway and buries it past Harding.

That's 4 points for Sid. Commentorblog called this points outburst. 4-2.
How wierd was it when they showed Bing's high-school coach after the goal?
Looked like a molester. He wasn't pleased at all with the goal.

Staal dominates on the PK later. Gets rammed into the boards.

The Wild were given a gift with this powerplay.
Sabu makes the save of the season for the Pens thus far.
Sprawing out and getting a piece of the puck.




Game.
Wild fans pack it up.
[ Thanks Zak for the pic. ]

The Wild lose their first home game of the season.

STATS
  • Crosby: 1G, 3A
  • Malkin: 2G, 1A
  • Malone: 2A
  • Gonchar: 2A


MISCELLANEOUS
  • What a game for Malone.
  • Didn't really notice Mark Recchi tonight, and he had 13:00. That's a good thing.
  • Sabu comes up big on the road. He's another solid game away from getting into the flash bar.
  • Who starts in Colorado?

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

PRESS CONFERENCE



Pensblog readers, esteemed members of the press, we are pleased to announce
that 500 WWGRD wristbands are now in our possession.


We'll now take your questions.


Hey, yo. When are you mailing these?

WEDNESDAY 10:00-11:00 AM


Hey, fellas. Why'd it take so long to get them delivered?

THE COMPANY WE WERE WORKING WITH DECLINED TO TELL US
THAT THE WRISTBANDS WOULD BE MANUFACTURED OVERSEAS.



Any word on Steeler wristbands?

GO TO HELL


Hey, guys. Jim Gray.
There are reports that you've been using performance-enhancing drugs to maintain the blog.

WHAT


Anything we should know about the wristbands?

YOU'LL EXPERIENCE A NUMBING SENSATION IN YOUR HAND.
NEARBY HOUSEHOLD PETS PISS THEMSELVES.


Meow


Smizik here.
You guys have no confirmation system for people who have bought wristbands.
How do we know who's getting wristbands sent to them in this batch of 500?

IF YOU SENT US SOMETHING THROUGH PayPal, WE RECEIVED IT.
SIMPLE AS THAT. TAKE IT TO THE BANK.
IF YOU GOT THE PayPal E-MAL WRONG, YOU'RE A JOKE.

IF YOU SENT MONEY IN THE MAIL, WE HAVE NO WAY TO MATCH E-MAIL ADDRESSES TO PEOPLE WHO SENT US MONEY, THEREFORE NO CONFIRMATION.

THE ORDERS WERE TAKEN FIRST COME, FIRST SERVE.

HERE IS A LIST OF PEOPLE WHO WILL BE GETTING WRISTBANDS IN THIS FIRST BATCH. [ List ]

IF THERE'S ANY CONFUSION, OR IF ANYONE THINKS THEY GOT THEIR ORDER IN EARLY AND GOT JOBBED, E-MAIL US.


Not good enough.

EAT US. WE'RE DOING WHAT WE CAN.


Smizik, you're a joke.

Guys, do you have more wristbands on the way to fill every order you've received?

YES, WE DO. THE NEXT BATCH OF WRISTBANDS IS COMING BETWEEN NOVEMBER 7th and 12th.


We've heard that before.


Can it Smizik.

Pensblog, have you set aside any wristbands for media members?

YES, WE HAVE SET ASIDE WRISTBANDS FOR MEMBERS OF FSN AND ESPN RADIO -- MEDIA FACTIONS THAT WE KNOW MENTIONED THE WRISTBANDS.


I don't want one.


Your mom does.


Who let Fedko in here?


SKKKKKKKKEEEEEOOOOORRRRESSSSS!!!!!!!!


Fedko needs jobbed. Big-time.





Guys, are you gonna have another batch ready for the playoffs?

PLAYOFFS? PLAYOFFS?! YOU WANT TO TALK PLAYOFFS?!
WE JUST HOPE WE CAN WIN A GAME.

PENSBLOG OUT.


Idiots, since this is the announcement...
can we see the wristbands?



Click to enlarge


GameDay (11) -- Pens @ Wild



7:00 Versus

[min.png]


PENSBLOG PRESS CONFERENCE
DURING SECOND INTERMISSION

...And Deliver Us From...


Picture: December 8, 2005
Minnesota @ Pittsburgh
One of the most pathetic performances in franchise history.

Wild 5
Pens 0

For an insane time capsule, here is ESPN's recap with highlights. [ ESPN ]

......................................................................

WWGRD UPDATE


Finally, after numerous calls to the company...



The only question now is whether or not a commercial American airplane can handle the wristbands.

The saga is coming to an end.
Thanks to everyone for your patience.

We have sent the tracking number to Snoop and Tee Jay of commentorblog so they can back up our claims.

We were starting to get kind of nervous, just as some of you probably thought we were just jobbing.
As soon as they come in, they're going right back out.

....................................................................................

PENS

-- Surprise. The Pens are inconsistent. [ NHL.com ]

Sidney Crosby, who is tied with Evgeni Malkin for the team lead in scoring with 13 points in 10 games, accused his teammates of playing too soft.

"We need to get a few more dirty goals," Crosby said. "If you look at the goals we do score, a lot of times they are right around the net. That is no fluke. You have to score like that."

Accused? Kind of strong.

-- Crosby goes back to Minnesota. [ NHL.com ]

-- Uh-oh. POWER RANKINGS. Pens are 16th. [ TSN ]

Pens have the third best powerplay at 23.2%
Not to be outdone, the PK is the best it's been in years at 83.3%

[ Empty Netters ] with the find of the week.
Jay Caufield going nuts.


................................................................................



ESPN thinks this is the NFL and decides to make sure all their columnists write a piece about cheap shots in hockey.

-- Burnside is a mistake. [ ESPN Burnside ]

-- Some guy makes a list of the top-10 dirtiest plays in NHL history. [ ESPN Some Dude ]

Number one:
Both players delivered vicious slashes and spears to one another before the incident ended with Maki clubbing Green over the head and fracturing his skull. Green needed three major operations to save his life and had a steel plate inserted in his head.

-- The Mullet speaks. [ ESPN Melrose ]

..........................................................

RBKBlog
[ Tournament of Logos ]

A fan's concept:





............................................................

Forsberg joins the Swedish national team for some tournament. [ TSN ]

[<span class=
Mikka Kiprusoff signs with Calgary through 2013-2014.
$5.8 million per year. [ TSN ]

[<span class=
Montreal is tops on their power play.
30.4%. Holy balls. [ Power Play Stats ]

Pens are third at 23.2%
Only team to score a powerplay goal in every game.

[phi.<span class=
Randy Jones gets two games for the Bergeron hit. [ NHL.com ]

"There have been suggestions by some that this hit was comparable to incidents earlier this season where players received significant game suspensions for blows to the head. These comparisons and suggestions are wrong," Campbell added.

[chi.<span class=
Welcome to the 21st century.
The Blackhawks are televising a home game. [ Blackhawks.NHL.com ]

[<span class=
Farewell to a underrated hockey player.
We hate everything that comes out of the old Capital Center.


But you got to respect some opponents.
Peter Bondra has retired from professional hockey. [ NHL.com ]
He was a thorn in our balls for many years.

[<span class=
Fanhouse comes through with some pictures and a walkthrough of Prudential Center. [ Fanhouse ]


Very fitting.



That Fanhouse article is a good read.
In it, we're told that there are $10 tickets in the corners of the arena.
That has road trip written all over it.

There are no weekend games for the Pens in New Jersey, so whatev.

[<span class=
The Rangers beat the Lightning.
Jagr is no longer pretty. And he loves you not.

You talk big-time wrestling, talk Mable's heroic run to King of the Ring in 1995.

Double J took a puck to the mouth and lost his front teeth.
As Tuesday progresses, there should be a good shot of it in highlights somewhere.

....................................................

Heroesblog

Best actor on TV.

The Haitian needs his own spin-off series.

..........................................................................

Islanders fans tailgating. [ The 2 Man Advantage ]


Would've liked to see some type of rain dance, but whatev.

...................................................................

Jimpac got a nice picture of Montreal fans stunned:


As always, we encourage everyone to take pictures at games and send them to us...
Especially pictures of the national anthems and anyone getting jobbed.



........................................................




Go Pens

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