Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Tuesday, May 22
Duke vs. Wainwright.

It will be recapped.

Oh, yes. It will be recapped.

Hopefully with the blessings of the hardest-working man in blogging, Pat from WHYGAVS.


Adam hasn't been anywhere near The Pensblog for at least the last 3 weeks.
He's been busier than Paris Hilton's publicist/vagina

But he's back...which means only one thing
Playoff brackets update before the Stanley Cup Finals begin.

This time, it's for real.


Wow some actual Penguin news on the Pensblog. Imagine that.
"I'm hopeful. I'm determined," Shero said. "I'd like to have both back. I think they both added a great deal to our hockey club. I made it clear to both Gary and Mark I want them back."

....Brett Hull jobs the ducks....
"If I was Detroit, I would not be worried about being down 3-2, because they dominated," Hull said on air after the game. "They can go in and win (Game 6) and come home and win Game 7."

Brett Hull is a joke

2007 Offseason jobbing tour

Not a whole lot going on.

Big Ben was at a golf outing according to BigBenNews.com

Picture: Ben staring intently at some naked dude on the fairway..

Meanwhile Big Batch News reports Charlie Batch was praticing.

"After donating blood, and working an eight hour shift at Goodwill.
Batch and Mark Eaton said mass at a local church."
Music Blog

No idea where to even start.

(Thenick) set the bar high:
Safety Dance

Corey Hart reference:
(Thanks to Tiffany)

Men at work
Couldn't pass this up
Thanks (Willsmith)

The Outfield
"Your Love"
(Dying Alive=money in the bank)
The guiatar player is feeling it.

90's music blog
A middle school dance
Early fall sometime around 1994 or so
All 4 one

What a gay video

A Winter in the Sun

Game #7
Saturday, October 21

Jordan Quits Staalin. PENS WIN.

"The sweet thrill of victory. Not just a nail-biter victory, either. A nice solid victory. As solid as Mark Eaton's physique, according to Paul Steigerwald and Bob Errey.
Gave up another 2-0 lead, but it really didn't feel like it was gonna be another Saturday night Pens loss at any point in the game."

Crap We Said:

  • Uhh...Jordan Staal and Letang are staying this year.
  • Armstrong is coming along.
  • We're gonna have to stop praising Crosby, Malkin, Eaton and Moore sometime.
CommentorBlog Said:

All the other commentors were Adam and Derek.

MessageBoardBlog Said:


Joined: 31 Jan 2006
Posts: 3091
Location: Pittsburgh

Reply with quote

I love how people are projecting Staal having success into a position he's really yet to even play.

Staal is great on the PK, but his even strength minutes are slim at best. He's getting SLIGHTLY more physical, but still isn't tough enough to go against a top checking line and be effective.

It's silly to say "Staal should stay because he's great on the Penalty Kill and can carry the puck". There are a lot of guys here like that. The question is what has Staal done 5 on 5 and has he consistantly shown that he can play at an NHL level and be productive?

At this point, I'm not sold that this is the case. It's a tough decision, but Staal doesn't have the offensive experience that makes me comfortable keeping him here yet. I think he would benefit from an extra year in Peterborough where he actually has the opportunity to hone some of that Raw talent that he has.

Lumping him in with players like Crosby and Malkin is absurd, there isn't anyone in that draft class that should even be mentioned in the same breath; therefore it's silly to try to compare apples to oranges. Both Crosby and Malkin were offensivley dominant and absurdly good upon their acquiring.

Jordan Staal > Jesse



Louis Lipps is my homeboy said...

Crap, I just posted some videos on yesterdays blog not knowing you were about to put up a new one.

Anyways, this one takes the cake for me.

Not sure if this is technically a music video, or just a good excuse to stick a music video/montage in the middle of a movie.

Watch it, love it, and remember "There's no easy way out":


Barrasso35 said...

Wow... I had no idea Dying Alive posted The Outfield before I did. I feel like such a Fedko.

This is why it sucks to have YouTube blocked at work.

Okay, Dying Alive, I'll see your Your Love and raise you The Outfield three years later.


There are no words in the English language to describe this.

Staff said...



wow what a find..hahaha

Jonny V said...

"He's got no emotion. At least he doesn't show it on his face. He could be happy, he could be sad, he could be hurting inside, and you wouldn't know it." -Bob Errey on Gary Roberts

My nads were in my stomach for the last ten minutes of Heroes. I was kind of expecting this epic, knock-down, drag-out fight with Sylar and the gang. The actual showdown was somewhat...lacking. Not sad seeing ol'boy Nate P die, just a shady dude, but at least he redeemed himself.

How money would this be if they had a Roberts' one (Thorburn?!?, Ekman?!?!?, Kwiatkowski?!?!?!?! and no Roberts?), imagine one of those babies sitting outside of the WPXI offices, taunting Fedko as he comes and goes from work. That woulda been good.

Barrasso35 said...

Today is Gary Roberts' birthday. He is 41. Happy birthday, Gary Roberts!
Please re-sign with the Penguins.

Louis Lipps is my homeboy said...

Wait, are you guys Matt Capps fans too?

I saw the guy warming up in the bullpen at spring training from about five feet away from the guy.

I feared for the bullpen catcher's safety.

And staff (whichever one of you it is), the record getting stuck in that guy's head is the greatest moment in hip hop video history.

Barrasso35 said...

Anyone seen John Fedko's WikiPedia entry lately?


Louis Lipps is my homeboy said...

More 80s rap goodness:


Would be much better if the guy at the beginning would shut up.

More (this is early-90s I think):


LL's hat sucks. Sorry.

Louis Lipps is my homeboy said...

Sorry, I might be the only one that cares about this one.

But I stumbled on this one that I didn't know existed.

Ice Cube and Ice T together! I don't know how this didn't destroy the space-time continuum.


Barrasso35 said...

Ice Cube and Ice T together!

Trespass... horrible movie, great song.

Louis Lipps is my homeboy said...

Ok, it's late and I've probably posted about 3 times too many already.

But on this subject of cheesey old videos I have the winner!! I know it!!

(special thanks to the Family Guy for helping me here):



Anonymous said...

Someone like this should win American Idol someday. Behold, the 2006 Eurovision winner:


FritoWill said...

Had Jesse's from the messageboardblog been on this site, we would have been killing him for the next 6 months.

Clearly does not have an eye for talent....so basically he should be a scout for the Pittsburgh Pirates.

Ahhh Matt Caps....THE MAN.... i don't know what is saddier, the fact that my wife knows his middle name.... or the fact that my wife knows his middle name.

Anonymous said...

when i hear 'safety dance' i immediately think BIO-DOME. anyone else? or is it just me....if you've seen the movie, you know the scene i speak of where they are all marching around the dome like in a train

loralei said...

How can you guys make this a Pirates Blog on Gary Roberts B-day? I fully expected a Robertsblog with random unimportant details about the man, the myth, the legend, Gary Roberts. Oh wait hold up...its tomorrow, my bad.

Alright I have no cheesy videos but I do have a random article link:

In Investors Business Daily an article which reminds us that Mario is pittsburgeze for God:


Barrasso35 said...

How can you guys make this a Pirates Blog on Gary Roberts B-day? I fully expected a Robertsblog with random unimportant details about the man, the myth, the legend, Gary Roberts. Oh wait hold up...its tomorrow, my bad.

Gary Roberts' birthday lasts an entire month.

Teej said...

Anonymous... Bio-Dome is an underrated and underappreciated movie. I know exactly what scene you're referring to. 90s reference (Bio-Dome) with an 80s song (Safety Dance)...golden.

Anonymous said...

I'm gonna laugh about the John Fedko Wikepedia all day. You guys are the best!

Staff said...

wow guys huge save on the roberts B-day thing.
No wonder I woke up and my entire family was missing


Jesse Marshall said...


i actually ate my words on that one later in the year, fritowill.

Loser Chris said...

It had to be done sometime:


Anonymous said...


im sure fritowill KNEW that Staal was going to have a season like he did. (sarcasm) this is the only annoying part about using old LGP posts.. i would like to hear some sound hockey analysis from some of these (pensblog commentors) people on a consistent basis..i bet there wouldnt be too many that could do it.

-Makhtar Ndiaye

dying alive said...

barasso35, I guess great minds think alike. I definitely can't top the three years later video.

One of the least politically correct videos ever, Yankee Rose by David Lee Roth:

I can't believe Heroes is over until September. I haven't moved from the couch since 10:01 PM last night.

wilsmith said...

alright, this is totally off-topic, but this is a video that must be seen by all.


Barrasso35 said...

No, no, no... Gary Roberts was born on 5/23/1966. I messed up by one day, which I tried to cover up with the Gary Roberts fact stating that his birthday is an entire month. (It would have been better written as "Gary Roberts' birthday is May." but that's another story.) loralei called me on my Fedko-like mistake and now I feel like Digbe... whatever that means.

This is all my fault, now my family is going to go missing.

Jesse Marshall said...

Mr. Ndiaye,

I don't think anyone could have predicted that kind of success. And most of what I said was true anyway. Staal progressed by leaps and bounds from October to March.

Loser Chris said...

That Fedko Wikipedia page may be the funniest thing ever. It's comforting to know that he has "turned to Gary."

Louis Lipps is my homeboy said...

Ahhh... I see your Yankee Rose, and raise you one "Just Like Paradise":


And I'll throw in the low-point of Kiss's career while I'm at it:


Louis Lipps is my homeboy said...

By the way, I'm at least 96% sure that the girl at the :58 mark of the video I just posted is a man.

Jason said...

the fedko wiki page is awesome, truely awesome. you gotta find a way to email it to his producer or something. i think he might hang himself once he reads it.

Jason said...

oh, almost forgot about this. Since men at work - land down under is the greatest 80s song of all time, then its assumed that this is the greatest cover song of all time


Barrasso35 said...

I think we should call/write Gary Roberts' agent, Rick Curran, and tell him how much Gary Roberts means to Penguins fans. I'll post this on LGP and HFBoards, too.

Here is his information:

Rick Curran
The Orr Hockey Group
and/or Representation Incorporated
411 Timber Lane
Devon, Pennsylvania
United States

Phone: 610-964-1062
Fax: 610-964-1007

I don't have a website or e-mail address, unfortunately.

Scott said...

ive been waitin for a recap of the pirates...i figure u guys could have fun with how bad they r

Anonymous said...

ok i figure this is a good a time as any to say this, and it is an especially auspicious time since it's dangerously close to gary robert's birthday.

you guys make my day, everyday. you know how the first thing you check online is your email? yea, the second one for me is the pens blog.

since i discovered it a couple of months ago, i cannot even tell you how much i have laughed at the pics, the analyses, and the pop culture references.

i have told many others, and they faithfully read too. you guys are too funny.

i'm moving to san diego next month, but i'm taking my pens with me....can't wait til they come out west!

so again, keep it up.

loralei said...

Barrasso35, You were totally on the ball. I didnt even know it was remotely close to his birthday until you brought it up. I felt the need to check it out for myself so I looked it up on the Pens website, only realizing that it was tomorrow because Matt Lauer announced that it was Tuesday, May 22, 2007. Thus the "my bad" half way through the post. You should be commended for your effort! Technically you were the only one that remembered. And it should be for a whole month.

PS. The Wikipedia thing is hilarious! I am directing all people i know to it. Even Bostonian ones.

Jonny V said...

I've trumped you all with the 80's videos. What other music video has Captain Lou Albano, Rowdy Roddy Piper, "Classy" Freddy Blassie, Nikolai Volkov milking a fake cow, and the best cast of kids in an 80's movie?

Good Enough

Barrasso35 said...

Thanks, loralei... I still feel like Digbe, though.

Here's something I was thinking about on the way to work.

Say Gary Roberts doesn't sign with the Pens again. Say he simultaneously signs with the Flyers and Capitals. Then, say the Flyers/Capitals (Captained by Gary Roberts, of course) meet the Penguins in the Stanley Cup Finals. Say Gary Roberts breaks Sid's nose and scores the Cup winning goal in game 7 overtime, in front of a packed Civic Arena and then hits Mario over the head with the Stanley Cup, irreparably breaking it in half.

Then, having won another Cup, Gary Roberts simultaneously signs one-day contracts with the Browns and Yankees so he can retire as a Brown and a Yankee. After his retirement ceremony, Gary Roberts burns down the entire city of Pittsburgh and places a call to ABC and has Heroes cancelled, in the middle of a season, in the middle of an episode and you never get to find out what happens. Ever.

Now, I know what you're thinking, "That could never happen. Someone can't play for two different NHL teams at the same time, Eastern Conference teams don't play each other in the Finals and he can't retire in MLB and the NFL since he's an NHL player," but he's Gary Roberts. Gary Roberts can do whatever he wants.

Say Gary Roberts did all that... I'd still buy a Gary Roberts jersey.

That's how sick Gary Roberts is.

Happy (early) birthday, Gary Roberts.

Barrasso35 said...

Gary Roberts' Legends of Hockey entry.


snoopyjode said...

thanks to barrasso35 for pointing out the fedko wiki entry.

"he turned to gary in high school" - gold

pensblog is the best blog ever.

wilsmith said...

This barely qualifies, but it was released in 1980.


is that the chick from beastmaster?

Barrasso35 said...

Somebody edited Fedko's Wiki again:
May 09, 2007, saw Fedko's Fone Zone call-in show get accosted by prank callers who tried to work the professional hockey player Gary Roberts into every conversation. The pranks continued for over a week until every caller appearing on the show on May 17 referenced Gary Roberts. On May 18, the show was forced to screen calls, cutting caller's questions short, thus angering many viewers.


Anonymous said...

I emailed the wiki article to fedko, he probably doesn't read his email because he's watching little boys at summer football camp.


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