Tuesday, October 3, 2006

Seeing as though the Penguins only played 10 games with Western Conference teams last year, and they will only play 10 THIS year, it would be impossible to give in-depth bullcrap about all the Western Conference teams. If we made a living doing this stuff, that would be a different story.

Instead of divisions, we're gonna show the Western Conference in terms of best to worst.

  1. Calgary Flames - Lost in seven games to the Anaheim Ducks in the second round last year. With Mikka Kiprusoff in net, they allowed a league-low 200 goals last year, although they only scored 218. The acquisition of Alex Tanguay should bolster the offense and it's gonna be fun watching Dion Phaneuf. Click here for a piece of red-hot, late 80's Calgary Flames propaganda.
  2. San Jose Sharks - Having Joe Thornton and Johnny CheechnChong for the entire year may boost this team into winning the uber-competitive Pacific Division. They defecated on themselves last year in the playoffs, letting a two games to none lead evaporate...losing four straight games to Edmonton.
  3. Anaheim Ducks - Chris Pronger has turned into the NHL's Tom Brady, as every expert covering the NHL wants to lick his sack. We aren't gonna lick his balls, but Anaheim DOES look like they're poised for something big this year.
  4. Detroit Red Wings - Yea, I guess it's time to finally put the Red Wings in the rankings. We hesitate, because they play in the worst division in North America. (Record against divisional foes in 05-06: 25-3-4. Gimme a break.) They followed up their President's Trophy regular season with a first round loss to Edmonton.
  5. Dallas Stars - Lost Billy Guerin, picked up Eric Lindros. Dallas is getting old. Fast.
  6. Edmonton Oilers - Yea, they lost Chris Pronger. Carolina won the Cup last year against Edmonton. Carolina didn't have Chris Pronger. Lesson: You don't need Chris Pronger to win a Cup. Dwayne Roloson was a pleasant surprise last year; Edmonton goes where he takes them.
  7. Minnesota Wild - Oh hell yeah. I would take Manny Fernandez as my goalie in a heartbeat. Score some more goals Minnesota. Wild Blog
  8. Nashville Predators - Same old story. People forgetting about Nashville until they realize there's only one playoff spot left and they know that the Preds will be there. Actually, you know what, switch Edmonton and Nashville in this list. Preds Blog
Also-Rans
  • Colorado Avalanche - They lost Rob Blake and Alex Tanguay, but they still have Joe Sakic.
  • Chicago Blackhawks & St. Louis Blues - Click here
  • Columbus Blue Jackets - Pressure's on to get into the playoffs. May be some magic in central Ohio this year.
  • Los Angeles Kings - Not as terrible as their record portrays, just stuck in a division with the Ducks, Sharks and Stars.
  • Phoenix Coyotes - The Great One racing Arizona Cardinals coach Dennis Green for who will be the first to get into the playoffs.
  • Vancouver Canucks - Luongo in net, one solid scoring line. Could get interesting, I dunno.
Player To Watch:
Tomas Vokoun. With him, Nashville can scare teams in the playoffs.

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